GABBEH!!™

Last day of 2010...

2010-12-31T21:33:00.002+08:00

Hello everyone...

First of all, I like to wish everyone a Happy New 2011!

Been quite some time since I updated this blog of mine. (This is how I always start my post, I realised)

Alot has happened in the year 2010... Me and Darling into year number 5... I swapped Brave for Valiant... Arsenal trophy drought into year number 5 (I just hafta mention that haha)... I'm 24 going on mid-20s... 4th year in the Navy... 12/10 with Bert & Hardi and 10 years with Leong... Got myself my first ever non-Nokia phone: a Blackberry... trip to Phuket... Struck my first ever Toto prize... Flew (or tried to) a kite first time ever... a cycling trip to Ubin despite being unable to cycle (thanks to Dean)... topped the Petty Officers' course...

Not too many memorable things however though. But there's always 2011... the year before the disaster year of 2012! (hopefully things turns out well)

Tony asked me earlier what are my Resolutions for the year 2011, and I realised I have not thought of any, and I retorted him with a rather dumb answer...

So before anyone ask me again... here are my resolutions:-

be the best I can be for my darling girlfriend and my precious mum
pass my IPPT earlier than this year
have a favorable conclusion in my search for my next career move
complete a downpayment for a new BTO flat
keep myself injury/sickness-free
treat my friends better
have more self-confidence in life
strive to make and SAVE more money
learn to drive
last but not least... a memorable year... the best year ever.

Thats alot of bullseye to aim for, but I think I will be able to complete most, if not all.

Here's to myself... and all the best to one and all, stay safe, and have a great 2011!

Gabriel =0)

2 pictures speaks 2 thousand words...

2010-04-19T23:28:00.000+08:00

Relocate me somewhere.... ANYWHERE!

2009-12-06T18:58:00.002+08:00

Sigh.. another sunday evening, time to book into camp soon (in approximately 2 hours + time?)

Had a good wkend with darling, but tt's abt it, nothing much to look forward to at work. Especially with a Duty on next Saturday. Sighs. That practically means I will only get to sleep at home once nxt wkend.

Good thing, POC is steaming at cruising speed already, 1 month has passed. My next posting doesnt seem to be any clearer than 1 month ago. -Sigh-

It's not a good post when you see me punctuating with Sighs... Shingz... -haha-

I wish.. i wish.. i wish..

I was Truman from Jim Carrey's The Truman Show. Lived 30 yrs of existance only to realise that I'm actually born into a movie world. If only I could find the exit door at this moment of my life. I want out of this job. I want a normal civilian life back, I want to have the freedom of staying at home on weekends. I don't want to be away from my loved ones.

I don't want... I don't want... I don't want...

Where's the Reset button thats supposed to be found on me?
Out.

Not feeling too good..

2009-10-11T14:15:00.002+08:00

Back after a really long time... at a time when I feel slightly detached from the rest of the world (maybe its just that I didnt leave house for slightly over 1 day)...

The year 2009 have been better than 2008... career-wise, relationship-wise... however, I feel that I grown apart from my old friends, and not so prompt at making new 1s. =\ It's this overpowering feeling that got me to turn to this fairly old blog of mine. It's a good thing Blogger doesn't remove any blogs, if not I would not have this little space of mine on the net after so long..

Let's recap..
It's my 3rd year of service in the Navy, and I felt I have came a long way. I grown into my role onboard the Ship, gaining respect from top and peers alike with the way I have gone about doing my work and asserting my presence, on a personal note, I felt it was an achievement. But I still don't feel the urge to stay on once my contract has ended. I feel that I'm still restricted in certain aspects of my life by the fact that I'm in the Navy. It's been a good time onboard Brave, but perhaps I'm looking for a different environment/ship and a new challenge.

It's my 4th year with Darling, on a personal level, I felt that it's been a breakthrough year. Both of us have meet each other's parents and felt at ease if not comfortable (hopefully, that will improve over time, and I hope -you- feel the same way too.)

I continue to support my favourite soccer club , Arsenal FC without fail, a new Fabregas jersey and a Arsenal beanie, adding to my collection..

And recently, I re-ignited my passion for Pool, and with the comeback of virtual pool 3 on my PC, anything is possible! haha. crap. Other hobbies include, playing Left4Dead at LAN shops with my friends.. so anybody interested can ask me go all these stuffs ok? haha.

AI QING LU!

2008-11-14T23:19:00.000+08:00

Just been hearing this song from the old serial show at 11pm... haha.. by Emil Chau. :) Enjoy. Lovely lovely lovely LOVELY song.

new song!

2008-05-20T10:34:00.003+08:00

Guitar Hero 3's Credit / Hardest song

Lyrics don't make much sense at times, but its still good on the ear.
Keep your speakers volume in check, its rather loud.

--Through The Fire and Flames--

On a cold winter morning, in the time before the light,
In flames of death's eternal reign, we ride towards the fight.
When the darkness has fallen down, and the times are tough all right.
The sound of evil laughter falls around the world tonight.

Fighting hard, fighting on for the steel, through the wastelands evermore,
The scattered souls will feel the hell, bodies wasted on the shore.
On the blackest plains in Hell's domain, we watch them as they go,
Through fire and pain, and once again we know...

So now we're flying we're free, we're free before the thunderstorm,
On towards the wilderness, our quest carries on.
Far beyond the sundown, far beyond the moonlight,
Deep inside our hearts and all our souls...

So far away we wait for the day,
For the lights all so wasted and gone;
We feel the pain of a lifetime lost in a thousand days-
Through the fire and the flames we carry on!

[Small interlude]

As the red day is dawning, and the lightning cracks the sky,
They'll raise their hands to the heavens above with resentment in their eyes.
Running back through the midmorning light, there's a burning in my heart;
We're banished from a time in a fallen land, to a life beyond the stars.

In your darkest dreams see to believe, our destiny is time,
And endlessly we'll all be free tonight...!

And on the wings of a dream, so far beyond reality;
All alone in desperation, now the time has gone.
Lost inside you'll never find, lost within my own mind,
Day after day this misery must go on!

So far away we wait for the day,
For the lights all so wasted and gone,
We feel the pain of a lifetime lost in a thousand days,
Through the fire and the flames we carry on!

[Big interlude]

Now here we stand with their blood on our hands,
We fought so hard now can we understand
Ill break the seal of this curse if I possibly can
For freedom of every man!

So far away we wait for the day,
For the lights all so wasted and gone,
We feel the pain of a lifetime lost in a thousand days,
Through the fire and the flames we carry on!

Updates!!

2008-04-06T09:05:00.004+08:00

AhhH! Long time since my last post.

In the process of getting my Bonus (wee) and gotten the Wii way before it (Bonus) arrived.

Been sailing and sailing. Its been longer now since saM went missing.

IPPT workyear has just started, along with the BMI taken into consideration (oops i fail BMI)

Feeling excited this year as the Ship going Tioman and Sattahip for exercises.

And speaking of exercises, been thinking of starting on some myself.

Most of my peers are going to ORD soon, so CONGRATULATIONS!

Jack went on Thailand/Cambodia backpacking trip for 20 days... Andrea went Taipei for 17... Wondering when I could go on a trip myself like the 2 of them (-Envies-)

Thinking of clearing leave in May and probably June, October - December... got 30 over days available. Anyone got anything on for me? (Haha)

Feeling monotone and disinterested which is just like this post itself, so I SHALL END IT HERE!

BYE!

HAPPINESS ONBOARD! =D

2007-11-30T23:20:00.000+08:00

"6!" that bugger of a PTI exclaimed.

With that, all my agony, all my despair, all my worries, all the pent up emotions down the drain!

I FINALLY PASSED MY IPPT!!!!!

Coupled it with my QM pass, i finally overcame the obstacles!

HOORAY!

new printer!

2007-09-23T13:01:00.000+08:00

finally. A NEW PRINTER. *insert ANY emoticon*

Now onto the digital camera im eyeing...

birthday gift from dar...

2007-09-21T10:30:00.000+08:00

a new addition..

2007-09-18T09:52:00.001+08:00

V-hive chair...

$495...

Feel Dumb...

For lower back...

Feel poorer...

a family demise

2007-09-18T09:30:00.000+08:00

In loving memory of BitBit (1997 - 2007)

End of a phase of life...

My pet bunny left for greener pastures the night before. So long, Bitbit. =]

Am sorry was not able to be by your side during your final hours.

Wherever you are now, I hope your happier than you were during the final days.

You are no longer suffering at least.

May someone else up there take better care of you. =]

do or die!

2007-08-26T12:31:00.000+08:00

QM and IPPT.

The biggest obstacle that stands between me and total happiness onboard.

Can I overcome it!?

Sigh.

Watch this space...

the start of a never-ending cycle?

2007-08-10T13:20:00.000+08:00

So.

Its 10th of August.

Just reached home from work.

I spent the 8th and 9th nearer to a lighthouse than my home.

All the pounding and rolling has probably gotten to me.

See the happy faces of everyone celebrating on the teevee rubbed it in.

Is this jealousy?

Or is it immaturity?

Oh well. Does it matter?

rantsssssssssss.

the year of the 21...

2007-08-05T19:33:00.000+08:00

Finally.

I'm going 21.

Here's the problem. Everyone else is turning 21. And everyones inviting everybody to their 21 yr old birthday parties. I doubt I will get to hold a party of my own. Oh well.

That's actually part of the problem.

I hate my job.

It's eating into my social life, so much so I think I don't have one now.
So far, I have missed my Cousin's wedding, a few of my secondary school friend's 21st birthday party, a few secondary sch friend's gathering such as festive season celebrations. Its down to the darn schedule. And I'm about to tell two more of my friend that I might not be able to go to their parties due to work.

Ugh.

I hardly have time for my belle too. All my weekend pool outings have dried up.

Can someone tell me how to get my social life back? Or am I too resigned (perhaps, lazy?) to do anything about the harsh fact.

It's a Sunday, and I only reached back home from work just in the afternoon. Tomorrow I'm going to work again. Any more jobs that offer such routines? I like to get to know them.

Adios.

Friday Hill - Baby Goodbye

2007-06-17T14:24:00.000+08:00

Look in your eyes I see a new story,
I can't deny my past ent perfect too,
Singin, I'm not here to get false answers
But just like you I got true questions too (yeah)

I never wanna let you go,
In ya eyes I can tell that is what we both know,
I neva wanna see you cry,
Or love so burn baby let it die,

(Baby, Baby, Baby)

[Chorus]
I wanted you to go your way,
I wanted me to go mine,
I, sittin here thinking,
Passing good time,
I wanted you to go your way,
I wanted me to go mine,
I never thought you'd say,
Baby goodbye

Hearin your voice just makes me remember,
All those times when we were nothing more than friends,
I knew you, you knew me, and everything was plain to see,
How did I let us get so deep?

I never wanna let you go,
In ya eyes I can tell that is what we both know,
I neva wanna see you cry,
Or love so burn baby let it die,

(Baby, Baby, Baby)

[Chorus]
I wanted you to go your way,
I wanted me to go mine,
I, sittin here thinking,
Passing good time,
I wanted you to go your way,
I wanted me to go mine,
I never thought you'd say,
Baby goodbye

[Rap]
Sure, I looked in ya eyes then I said,
Baby I loved all the time that we spent,
Then you replied with a tear in ya eye,
It should come to an end then we'll both be friends,
Both shed tears then we sat for a while,
That stone cold fear then putting on a smile,
Know that your leavin looking to the sky,
That one dark evening killin me inside,
Through a new doorway to a next life,
Cuz you've gone you way and I'll go mine,
Yo, I still see ya face though we've both been apart,
I know you've got your place deep in my heart,
Sure, I just feel so down,
Mite come around but its for the best now,
Both broke down and I'm choked inside,
And from the first time when I said baby goodbye,

Baby I tried to understand,
Why ya had to leave me,
And why ya had to be free,
Lady I hope you understand,

(I didn't disagree, and why we weren't meant to be)

[Chorus (x3)]
I wanted you to go your way,
I wanted me to go mine,
I, sittin here thinking,
Passing good time,
I wanted you to go your way,
I wanted me to go mine,
I never thought you'd say,
Baby goodbye

To My G.G.G

2007-06-16T18:15:00.000+08:00

I had an compulsion to pour out everything I felt at this moment in time.

I am so sorry for spoiling your day yesterday. I given my explanation but I maybe didnt reveal my feelings too much.

I truly adore you.

I LOVE YOU.

I remember worrying about you every single day when we are apart.
I panic whenever you fail to reply my SMS-es immediately.
When you were down, I felt my day went bad as well.
When I am down, you did your best to raise my spirits, giving a shoulder for me to rest on.
The times when we waited for each other to come home; come online; calls from each other... The times you held my hand and you said you wanna bring them home with you...

I missed the walks we had down the river, the jogs we had down the beach, the books we read together in the libraries, the movies we watched together in the cinemas, the stroll in the parks, the clueless wandering of places where we didn't plan, the meals we had together, the time we spent looking into each other's eyes, the little chats we shared throughout...

I looked upon you as the other half that I been looking for all along. Its unfortunate, almost ridiculous how it ended. It's my choice probably because I'm timid. I always said that you are a scare-dy cat... but perhaps now you can have the last laugh.

Already I feel a tinge of regret. I dunno how to eradicate this bad feeling. Maybe time will wash away all these. With time, we might lose contact and we will only think back of each other as just another person who left footprints in our lives.

You deserved better. Someone who will love you and take care of you more capably than me. Someone who wont be away on the seas and bonded to some organisation.

It hurts badly as I recount every single experience we went through.

I wish that I had the solution to all these.
I wish I could wake up from this nightmare.

It's gonna be so lonely from now on.

No more dates to look forward to.
No more messages to my phone everyday.
No more meanings to be found in my weekends.
My world revolved around you and it just stopped spinning.

Can I still turn to you if I'm all down and out?
The tears aren't drying up just yet....

Love,
B.B.B

Welcome To Wherever You Are

2007-05-06T10:38:00.000+08:00

I'm going to Tuas tomorrow with mixed emotions but this song shall stand me in good stead...

Bon Jovi - Welcome To Wherever You Are

Maybe we're all different
But we're still the same
We all got the blood of Eden running through our veins
I know sometimes it's hard for you to see
You're caught between just who you are and who you want to be

If you feel alone and lost and need a friend
Remember every new beginning is some beginning's end

Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life; you made it this far
Welcome, you got to believe
That right here, right now you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Welcome to wherever you are

When everybody's in and you're left out
And you feel you're drowning in the shadow of a doubt
Everyone's a miracle in their own way
Just listen to yourself, not what other people say

When it seems you're lost, alone and feelin' down
Remember, everybody's different; just take a look around

Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life; you made it this far
Welcome, you got to believe
Right here, right now you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Be who you want to be, be who you are
Everyone's a hero, everyone's a star

When you want to give up and your heart's about to break
Remember that you're perfect; God makes no mistakes

Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you got to believe
Right here, right now you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far(I say welcome)
Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far(welcome) you gotta believe
Right here right now, Welcome

I really wish I know when will be the next time I'm here to type something out. Haha. I'm thinking if pessimistically, why not think the other way round, I wonder... born pessimist laa. Haha =]

the gabbeh has landed...

2007-04-28T23:42:00.000+08:00

Yo yo yo , check it out!

Gabbeh's back in business! New template albeit a default one to start the blogging season off again. It's almost 5 months since the year 2k7 started and well, I was free enough to come here and say something.

It's almost a year since I got enlisted (and also, blogged). And boy, has the year being a mixture of joy and sorrow. Gone were the days where I get stuck at home for hours during weekdays, I now only have the luxury of weekends at home. Soon-to-be.. irregular days at home. Met alot of people while in service. All kinds of people. My cloudy future seems alittle more clearer now and I'm thankful for that. Gonna post out of IMOS soon, so probably feeling rather worried about what's next. But if I am forced to speak the truth, I would say I feel confident of handling whatever that comes my way when I'm going for O.J.T.

Family-wise, it's much calmer nowadays, except for the odd argument that happens every bi-monthly (most of the time, though there are exceptions)... so I think overall 3rd quarter of 2006 to 1st quarter of 2007 have been an improvement from the past.

I'm growing fatter though, and I still have yet to pass my IPPT. I'm getting closer. Hopefully I can pass on my next try. Haha. Wish me luck man.

Not that eloquent on my return back to this blog... hopefully I might find some time to pick it up again. But nevertheless, an update.

See ya peepos.

GABBEH!

frustrated and moody

2006-05-31T14:37:00.000+08:00

DISCLAIMER: This is a long winded RANT.

I am F-R-U-S-T-R-A-T-E-D and M-O-O-D-Y!

Argh. Just came back from a 4 days trip to KL with Bert, Yanzhi and JD. Bought my first ever cue. No brand except for a triangle at the butt base, and a grey cue case with a 9ball logo as its brand.

Saturday night, down with fever. Sore throat, felt pain in the cheek. Suspected gum infection + wisdom tooth causing unneccessary pain.

Sunday, sore throat became inflammatory after a series of profuse coughing, and more pain in the cheek. Blood in phlegm.

Monday, inflammed throat + inflammed gum, cant chew, speak, eat, drink properly.

Tuesday, back to sore throat. Went to Century for the first time since my return, with my new cue and cue case happily. Night was spoilt when i discovered my cue was bent. By impact or by warpage was not immediately clear, but my mood was destroyed. Lent the stick to Brian and saw him breaking with it, my first immediate reaction is to blame him but I calmed down after some while. Feeling really upset over the bent cue shaft.

Wednesday, went to see the dentist. He said wisdom tooth was only partially out, only way of removal would be by a small surgery. My theory of the wisdom tooth pushing the tooth infront of it out, causing pain, was destroyed when he put me on the X-ray. It showed the tooth infront of the wisdom tooth was in fact longer by growth. (What the heck have I been doing all these years without ever realising it!) And the usual, "Your gum condition is not really good" Sigh. No matter how I try to make up for not brushing in the past, it never seems to be enough to any dentists. Oh well.

I also looked up on the web for cue shops around in Sg, and found a few, some in familiar places others not. I wonder if i should try and get my cue fixed or save up and buy a McDermott. I will not buy anymore cue to replace this cue, still feeling very noobish about cue care, no point wasting money for now.

So annoying. Everything I buy something pricey and new for the first time, it will turn out wrong one way or the other. New comp, 1st servicing within 1 week of delivery. 1st pair of soccer boots, lost on the MRT after only the 2nd outing. New pool cue, discovered bent after only first outing. It's almost like all my fault yet I'm so helpless to try and rectify it. I'm really pissed with myself.

Friday going back to base to collect BMT Barang Barang. A little worried about going in for BMT next friday. The plan to try and exercise myself to slightly more fitness didn't really materialise. (Welcome to my world of Laziness.)

Overhaul. That's what I need. I'm too deep into the dumps.

"Arsenal are in the Champions League Final for the first time in their club's history!"

2006-04-27T00:46:00.000+08:00

Need I say more?

My beloved Gunners survived the expected onslaught from an overzealous (and at times, cheating) Villarreal side after Kolo Kolo has given us the precious 1 goal lead from the first leg at Highbury.

To be honest, the 2nd leg wasn't really the spectacle it was hyped up to be, up till the final 2 minutes when it suddenly exploded in controversial circumstances. The darn Jose M... (not Mourinho but Mari, but both are equally shite!) went down in the penalty box after a slight nudge from our young left back, Clichy. It was the worst ever possible feeling I ever got from a soccer match. It's worse than the Wayne Bridge winner at Highbury in the quarter finals 2 years ago... I mean, whats up with the Ref.. 2 minutes to go before someone reached the Final, and he have to come out and grab the limelight!?!

So it was the Argentine wizard, schemer, football aristocrat, Riquelme VS Lehmann, the German Psycho, with a penchant of screwing things up at the most awkward of times to decide whether the match would be sent into extra time OR Arsenal to Paris on May the 17th.

I must admit, I never had the habit of nail-chewing no matter how nervous I was, but yesterday was absolutely different, I was squatting down with a pillow on the floor, all wide awake at 5am in the morning, wishing Lehmann would just get this right. From the look of Riquelme's face here...

One would think, there is absolutely NO CHANCE that he will come up with a weak penalty at such a critical time. Then this happens..

YAY!!! LEHMANN PUNCHES IT AWAY!!! And I just went ballistic! Jumping up and down like a monkey in front of the TV asif it was me who saved it! LOL! At that moment, the tiredness of not sleeping and being awake for almost 20 hours just abandoned me right on the spot. It was an incredible feeling and quoting from Siva.. "It feels better than SEX just for the moment" Heh. It sure feels great to be a Gooner! =D Arsenal Forever!!!

Hola!

2006-03-04T16:18:00.000+08:00

Yeay! It's me again. Finally POLY is over!!! *whistles* WEEEeeeeweeEET*!

Just had my last paper yesterday. Boy, this sem my grades are probably gonna be D,C,C,C. Never got a C before in the first 2 1/2 years and now... everything becomes a C! x.x

My previous post... I currently dun have the mood to follow up on it so probably gotta wait alittle while more before I get warmed up to the idea again. Hmm, it was dated Jan 18 *shocked* oops... I neglected this blog of mine again. Let me see what I can update here.

February...

First ever Valentines' Day passed with me being attached. Wahaha! What a crappy achievement. Pardon me Darling *hee*. She gave me a RW disc, and I didn't really get her a prezzie. =x

I had my first NAPFA test in 3 years. Needless to say, my meagre preparation was nowhere enough for the test itself. Wahaha. Held on a rainy day, first station go for Chin Ups already. I just looked at the tester... "Alright, just put a big fat 0 there" -LOL- Starting only, got a morale dampener. I failed SBJ and 2.4km run by half a minute (sigh!).

Grand total: 8 points (5 from Sit & Reach... guess my fats helped alittle there. Which leaves me with 3 if this had been IPPT! OMFG ROFLMAO)

Oh yea... I went to the library during one of the days in Feb with my darling to slack there... and I found a book entitled "Arsenal - The Unbeatable Season" weeee. As I was browsing through, this picture caught my eyes. My favourite player with his arguably proudest moment. All rise and hail Dennis "The Menace" Bergkamp! =x

Otherwise there isn't much to say about February... Just plenty of slogging away for the exams and FYP (another finally done \o/ ), playing hard.

I picked up a MMORPG titled Guild Wars from Naelin recently. Been farming and playing the game like mad. The graphics are pretty good despite the medium settings in the game and running on my low end graphics card. Here are some of the screenshots as I journeyed through the game as a lowly monk, all the way from level 1 to level 20! =D

Haha meet Ezgert Strafe! =x

Anyway, I sent invites to Bert, Iz for them to try out the expansion on March 24. If anybody is interested, can just inform me, still got 1 free invite =x

Hmmm. With all of that said, I kinda reached the end of the post. Long time never sit here type out posts, dunno what to say. Lol. When I got ling ji yi dong (ideas), then I will continue again. For now, just let me enjoy the few days before I get enlisted (dunno when though, hopefully longer) I guess.

Oh ya, before I forget. Here's a prank call (would bring you to another page) played on someone. Ask me who it is lol . Just listen, sorry for the breakup into 18 short clips though. Would require Nokia Suite or Realplayer. =D Boy, aren't my friends wicked. LOL. Enjoy people.

Cya guys.

19 years of my life... part 1? lol.

2006-01-18T01:17:00.000+08:00

Ever had times when you just felt like saying to someone or something up there that goes like "Bring me back in time, back to the very day when I was born... and give me the chance to re-live my life again!"

Nothing to do, just felt like listing down the significant milestone of my lengthy yet next-to-nothing life.

Alright, here goes, without much consideration of how accurate the data is going to be:

1986

I was born in K.K Hosp. Year of the Tiger. Lesser babies than usual this particular year cos everyone believes that children born in the year of the Tiger would be much more volatile commpared to babies born in other years. Hmm. Makes you wonder, shouldn't dragon be worse than tiger? And yet ppl rush to bear a child in Dragon's years... Couldn't remember much about this particular year. Too young. Weighed 3.3kg. Pretty heavy (and the trend will go on. lmao)

1987

Again, nothing in memory about this particular year. Probably a baby just lazing around all the time. Never bothered to learn words, or more importantly, start walking. (Again, it's a trend that will go on.)

1988

Hmm. Not too sure if I celebrated my birthday with my female cousins from my father's side. Saw it from some photo album my Mum had long long ago. One delicious looking blackforest cake with several plates of cut oranges, and agar-agar (my personal favourite!) lying around with 2 female cousin by my side, clapping my hands. Now.. if only life had stayed that way. Hee.

1989

3 years old! That's the age my mum said I finally started to walk on my own. My mum once said I was too lazy to even stand up and walk on myself. She have to carry me around all the time and mind you, I wasn't the lightest of babies and I begin to feel like a dumbell when I was 2. Haha. After spoiling me for so many years, my mum finally got me to walk with the help of my uncles. They suggested leaving me in a spot far away from my mum. And no helping was allowed, as it was pretty obvious I was just plain lazy and reluctant to walk. With no choice, but to stand up and stumble slowly in search of my mother, I promptly did it. Hooray. What an achievement. (Man, I got no shame, spilling this out here. Lmao)

1990

Hmm. I think my Mum finally thought I was old enough to survive under another stranger's care, and went to work. I was brought to this Nanny who was staying about 2 streets away from my house. This Nanny, cant really remember her. Just remember her as the "Block 239 Aunty". She was looking after 2 other kids plus 1 baby while looking after me. Well. I just remembered I din have a good time there. Always eating porridge with just soy sauce for meals while I was there. I remembered she always tried to put all of us to sleep while she went to do her own stuff. I was always positioned under the baby's sack, and I will kick and kick the sack until I make the baby cry, just to piss the Nanny off. Haha. Life was poor, but the childhood days was still fun.

1991

Kindergarten! 1st year. I got to wear this light blue shirt and dark blue pants and go to the kindergarten in Blk 254... First time I really come into contact with other kids of my own age. I was never the neighbourhood playground kid. I was always at home, dazing and slacking kid. Made friends with 2 girls, 1 older and the other my peer, when I changed Nanny to some aunty living 2 floors directly below my flat. Always went to play board games with them. Maths was so poor that whenever I rolled the dice... I always move my pieces in such a way that it seems asif the dice roll was n - 1. Could remember how pissed the gals became when telling me that isnt the way to play, and yet I wouldn't relent. Haha. What a unreasonable twit I was. Smacked the same girl in the face and made her cry. So much so until her grandma came to me and gave me a "hairdryer treatment". Lol. What a pity. Ever since then, the relations just deterioated. Nvr got a chance to say 'Sorry' and she moved away as time passed.

:
:
:
To be continued
Can't finish everything at 1 go, lol. It's late. I gotta sleep soon. XD
Cya guys.

New Year, New Post?

2006-01-01T19:59:00.000+08:00

First day of 2006! I should have alot to say. Haha.

A little update on what's upcoming in my life now these days. Alright, let's start with school! Ok, I'm already well into my 2 weeks (1 E-learning, 1 study break) of holidays, in fact, the exams are gonna start in 2 more days! *gasp* Haha. I feel so unprepared. This should not be the case! But too bad la, I seemed to get infected with the Civilization 4 craze along with my classmate. Been playing the game till 3, 4 am in the wee hours of the morning for the past few days.

After the exam week, I gotta head back to base to declare some indebtedness form to the guys in the Sea. Following which I will put all my energy into finishing up my FYP. I should have another week of break coming up when the SPINNOVEX comes along in January. Following which, there will be Chinese New Year AND GGG's Bday (Happy Birthday in advance, Darling! ^_^)

Febuary would bring me to the moment which I feared the most since I entered Poly... the very intimidating NAPFA (or IPPT if you insist) test is here! X_X Still haven't got any of the items into shape, I think I will find it hard to even pass any of the items. Shit man, that means for the very first time, my allowances might be suspended. I better work hard with slightly more than a month to go.

What else... Oh yah. Got a favour to ask all of you. If you happen to travel to the Philippines or Taiwan, please please please tell me. I need you to get me something. Don't worry I will definitely pay in advance. Haha.

I been toying with the idea of renting a flat when I start my bond the next time. Anybody got any idea roughly how much a rented (say 1 room or 2 room) flat in the East would cost? Preferably somewhere near Tanah Merah so I could have an easier time. I just couldn't foresee myself driving a car back and forth to work every single day.

Poly is coming to an end now. Hopefully it will pass without much trouble. With 2 1/2 years gone, the last thing I need is an extension. Alright that's all for now. Catch up with you guys nxt time! Cya.

"I do."

why can't just I get something right?

2005-11-25T23:20:00.000+08:00

Went jogging today... Halfway, cannot make it alrdy. Start, stop, start, stop. Damn unfit sia. Then halfway reached Rail-Mall.. then went in the Cold Storage and came out with 1 bottle of mango flavored Snapple and 1 packet of Ruffles. Then sat down with Lin by the drain and watch the traffic and the sky while munching the Ruffles and finishing up the drink, somewhat like some fricking beggars by the side of the road. Damn slack la, Chin ups are still hopeless for me.. moving on to other stuffs....

"right... right... right... WRONG!"

Ever had that happening? Haha. You do something, or say something... that appears so correct, so well planned.. then all of a sudden on the last stretch, something/someone shouted out, WRONG!!! *Screeeeechhhhes*

I'm too sensitive... ahh. Help. Help in-sensitize me... I'm too immature... help me mature! Haha. I think I'm going nuts. I tried too hard sometimes... but please put up with me. =]

I wish I could be perfect... but nah, I could never be. Piang eh, what kind of attitude is that, Gab...?

"You can get it if you really want, you can get it if you really want, you can get it if you really want, but you must try... try and try... try and try... you succeed at last!" -- Jimmy Cliff

difficult day...

2005-11-23T19:02:00.000+08:00

Missed yet another lecture. Ahhh, what's happening to me?

9+ to 5+ in the project lab.

Woo-la-la... I'm trying to wrap up the programming of the FYP in 1 single day! (Is that right? Haha.) Feeling rather braindead now... though I still harbour hopes of finishing up the programming today, but it seems abit too far for me right now.

Nevertheless, I shall try! Never give up, Never surrender! Haha.

Saw MX on my way home... she looked kinda different with long hair... Haha. Managed to catch a glance and picked up my courage and waved a Hello at her. Finally, not avoiding anymore, well done, Gab! Haha. I'm such a loser... alright la, thats all folks!

"I put my trust in you, no matter what..."

Endless Euphoria

2005-11-16T23:41:00.000+08:00

Hello people...

I dunno how to put this across as I dunwant too many people to know what happened. So I will just say I'm extremely happy with things in my life nowadays. I'm going about everyday thinking that I'm living a dream... Haha... but I was just told by someone that it wasn't a dream! So... haha, to that someone, thank you!

"Discovery of the day: I speak incoherently when I'm extremely happy."

Again and again

2005-11-14T23:26:00.000+08:00

"Life is full of surprises." Whoever was the first to mutter this out under his/her breath is a bloody genius!

Haha. I'm typing this devoid of feelings at the moments. Not devoid of colours though! Haha. I am daft, and you guys knew it. (And no one bothered to tell me! Good people you sure are... Haha)

Some things in life, when forced through, could have good results and bad results. Some results would leave you dunno whether to laugh or cry. Perhaps I'm just sandwiched in between.

I'm speaking so vaguely that I wondered if anyone of you actually knew what I am talking about. Then again, I dun feel anything, so who cares? Haha. Alright. Enough, all of you get back to the life you came from (which should and ought to be much more interesting than mine) and stop wasting your time here reading this crap. Begone!

"Want you to love me...
Want you to be...
the Heavens above me...
Eternally..." --- Background vocals from Robbie's Tripping

How am I feeling. How are you feeling. How are we feeling? I wanna know.

2005-11-12T16:40:00.000+08:00

Definition of lovesick from www.dictionary.com :

adj.

1. So deeply affected by love as to be unable to act normally.
2. Exhibiting a lover's yearning.
3. Languishing because of love; "strong men behaving like lovesick boys"

Definition of melancholy from www.dictionary.com :

noun.

1. Sadness or depression of the spirits; gloom: “There is melancholy in the wind and sorrow in the grass” (Charles Kuralt).
2. Pensive reflection or contemplation.
3. (Archaic.) Black bile.
4. (Archaic.) An emotional state characterized by sullenness and outbreaks of violent anger, believed to arise from black bile.

adj.

1. Affected with or marked by depression of the spirits
2. Tending to promote sadness or gloom: a letter with some melancholy news.
3. Pensive; thoughtful.

I must have excess black bile secreted inside me! HA! woh woh woh...

"If loving you was a crime, then I will be spending the rest of my life in jail"

I feel weird.

2005-11-10T21:10:00.000+08:00

It was actually just an alright day. But it just went awry when I came home sat by my computer like I do everyday, and my mum just peered in to view what I was playing. I just couldn't stand her curious stare and I just exploded. A tiff ensued and once again I was in the wrong. I will always be in the wrong when it involves mum. As I spent a few hours in my room in isolation... my Mum just continued screaming at me.. saying I nvr been this, I nvr been that and that 3 yrs of poly studies has changed me alot.

Change I did I guess. So does everyone. But I think I really grown to be apart far apart from everyone. Apart from friends. Apart from my classmates. Apart from my parents.

I dun want it to be this way, but I dunno how to change. I dun like people to be so deliberate in finding out what I am doing, but at the same time, I dun want to project an impression to others that I am stuck-up and withdrawn from the world. I dunno la. I feel like such a outcast.

Bye.

"The Prophecy is coming true. I dunwant my life to be panned out the way it was predicted! NO!!! I wanna be in control of my life... I dunwant to spun around by the webs of Fate."

In the end...

2005-11-07T23:05:00.000+08:00

I'm putting my hands clasped together in the hope that I will be guided through slowly and softly. I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Let's just hope it's not a false dawn. I know where I stand. I will bow out gracefully.

"... it doesn't even matter."

Miserable.

2005-11-06T12:53:00.000+08:00

BANG! Sunday Afternoon! And I'm at home typing this post!

Just came back from lunch. Alone. Another typical moody day. Where's the spark in my life? I'm so far apart from those who are close to me that I don't even know where I belonged anymore.

I just dawned upon another fantasy of mine, and that is... to stay at home 24/7! Haha. I dunwant to see anyone. I dunwant to go out. I dunwant to be bothered with school, projects and other stuffs. I just wanna be home, safe from the rain, problems, Sun, and just about everything else.

I just dunno what else I could do to feel better. I'm refusing to leave the house since soccer outing yesterday. Friends asked me to go pool today, I turn down. Dad asked me to go for breakfast in the morning.. at first I said yes.. later I said "No, I need a rest". I just wanna be left alone, yet I want to be with somebody. I'm afraid I will go all bonkers.

I feel like the homeless. Unwanted. Unloved. Despised. Maybe I just want myself to think that way.

I bought Ruffles chips, M&M peanuts & a bottle of MUG root beer on my way home... I guess the best way for me to get about this stupid dip is to munch my way out. Haha. Looping Akon - Lonely on my computer... it's probably the best way to spend my lazy Sunday afternoon at the moment.

I just hope I won't have to wait long for this bad, bad, down-trodden feeling to pass. I will come back a stronger person. No doubt about it. I just hope that I would be back to my bubbly self soon.

My world just crashed, and I'm picking up the pieces.

"Don't just sit there and look. Give me a hand, would you?"

BANG!

Heart over Mind or Mind over Heart? Thats my question to myself.

2005-11-05T09:31:00.000+08:00

Normal Days...

Brain: I want you to do this!
Leg: Affirmative.
Brain: I want you to do that!
Hands: Roger that!

So one fine day, Brain needs to work with Heart to work out a decision.

Brain: I think our master need to just give things up.
Heart: No! I think our master should try to hang on to things. And with that, comes hope that things would take a turn for the better.
Brain: According to me, it's more logical to give things up so to move on to better and finer things.
Heart: I refuse!
Brain: You must accept my commands!
Heart: No!
Brain: Yes!
Heart: No! No! No! I'm more emotional, therefore what I control the master to do in the spur of the moment is usually right!
Brain: Nah. I'm more logical and rational, I control the master to execute things planned well in advance and usually with the correct results. Emotions are useless in solving problems.
Heart: Sometimes I work faster than you, I give the master emotions, I give the master strength to carry out things that you would never dare control the master to do.
Brain: With emotions, comes the tendency to commit mistakes...

Meanwhile, as they carry on their bickering...

All other parts of the body (in unison): What are we gonna do? Should we follow Brain or shld we follow Heart?

The End.

Another listless day.

2005-11-04T22:48:00.000+08:00

I made it to school on time today. Didn't rush at all even though I left house at 7.30 sharp. Took a different route though. Took the bus behind my block and stopped outside Central and took the train to school. Maybe I should do that everyday. Its a chore walking all the way to the bus stop that has 106, only to squeeze on the bus and stand all the way. Perhaps I'm just plain lazy.

School went relatively smoothly today, though during the break, I, Naelin and Jit & Co went Queensway to help Guru shop for a pair of street soccer boots. After school, the whole big gang of us just bundled ourselves into Raj house to watch a Hindu movie! Haha. Chips, Soft Drinks and Vodka were all around. I took a sip of Vodka + Sprite combined and immediately felt the heat building up inside. Stopped almost instantly. Was feeling so worried about my whole face going red, as someone else has already done so.

Came home at around 7+. Sat in front of the comp until now. Played FM and got the EURO Cup! Haha. After that I just quit the game and just daze until now. Thoughts inevitably flowed into my mind again. I wish I could put something like a bottleneck around my mind... stop it from processing so much. Making me all moody... Haha. Reminds of the Code Red's song "What Good Is A Heart"... just that now in this case, it is "What Good Is A Mind"? lol. I'm crap.

Just typed "short inspirational stories" into Google out of the blue and to my surprise, quite a number of results immediately sprung up. I'm gonna put one of them in my links page later. Found several interesting short stories that you ppl might/might not have seen before.

I dunno why I still managed to blabber so much when I feel that I have nothing to say, haha. Ok la, really nothing to say le, thats all folks.

"Resigned to reality. I have stopped dead in my tracks. I think I found myself struck off your list."

2005-11-04T22:28:00.000+08:00

I won my first major silverware in FM 2006! Haha. Arsenal --> EURO Cup champs 2005/2006 XD

I am a stupid child

2005-11-03T00:17:00.000+08:00

Just downloaded the chinese song.. Old song. It's actually a remix by Andy Lau and Jacky Wu, got some dialogue in the middle of the song which is quite funny. Listening to them, makes me wonder, when I grow up to become a middle aged guy, would I have a group of male friends to laugh, cry, sing, chat with me? Haha. Thinking too much already.

Half the world is into Hari Raya le, at this point of time. I will like to take this opportunity again to wish all muslims in the world Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri! =]

Anyway, I shall move on with some thoughts of my own. Recent events have made me pretty tired, disillusioned. FYP, work, stuffs that really drained me... I finally figured out that perhaps I shld just leave everything to destiny or fate. I no longer feel that I have the will to change things or shape my own path to my future. I dun think I have the determination nor the ability to really gave a big shakeup to how my life's gonna be. Perhaps for some people, "When there's a will, there's a way" cliche would be more apt for them, but not me.

I guess I will be neutral in the future, dun get overly panicky and overly agitated with things that doesn't go my way. I believe things would even their way out. I will just do my part and see what comes my way. Haha. Sound pretty hopeless man.

Felt like I had the symptoms as listed in those depression posters posted at some bus shelters. Haha. In the poster, they asked "Feel that life is hopeless all the time?" and then they say "Perhaps you are suffering from Depression." HA! I guess I need to dial the hot-line straightaway.

I have never been too bad in life, but neither am I too good... I'm always snugly fit into the very centre of standards. Always the "Mr Average" among everybody.

I can't sing as well as the pros but I think I could sing better than some.

I had flat foot symptoms but it wasn't as bad as the other flatfoot-ed people. I could still run and do streneous exercise.

I didn't achieve Master Sergeant rank while in NCC, or achieved any post within the setup while I was back in Sec 4, but I did get a 1st sergeant rank.

I didn't score very well among my pri 6 class to go to any of the prestigious SAP school, but I made it into BP, which was referred to in the past as the "RI of the West".

I'm no party animal (never partied in discotheque before) , but neither am I an extreme nerd (I can't study for hours straight).

I'm alright in soccer, cant do stepovers, but yet able to do a telling pass or score the old spectacular goal. (Ok, maybe that was in the past.)

I had only 1 girlfriend before, and even that lasted for just 1 month! Not too many, not too long (duration), not zero, and not too short. (This is a statistic I have been trying to change, and change I did not.)

Even my height. At 1,75m, I'm just an average height SG chap. Nowadays, there are those towers walking about, that I feel a sense of inferiority whenever I brushed shoulders (well at least tried to) with them.

I am just so average that I really dunno what I am really good at. Haha. Someone tell me. I'm feeling so hopeless, so down. Why am I born into this world as Me?

The other day I was in this bus, looking at the window.. suddenly caught sight of 1 small living white organism which is about the size of 1/12 of a sesame street? It was slowly moving up and down the glass window of the bus, and my heart really goes out to the poor chap man. I don't even know if it could see, but it have to go around aimlessly until it finds a reason why it was brought here into this world. Perhaps I am just a enlarged version of that "speck of dust" organism, unsure of why I am here, and what my destiny or aim in life actually is. All I could do is wander about aimlessly, knocking on the 'doors in life'.

Sometimes I wonder, where do we go after we move on into so called "Afterlife"? Do we really actually assume another form of ourselves in another world? Or do we just *poof* into thin air? I remember reading this novel about Death going around the world collecting perfectly balanced souls (equal good & evil) due to the difficulty in determining whether they shld go to Heaven, Hell or even Purgatory? He met this 'client' of his and before dying, that client saw Death has came to pick him, and then he told Death, "I don't believe in Afterlife", after which, when he died, his soul just shattered into many pieces. Death couldn't fathom why he couldn't collect the soul he was sent to collect.

Haha. I read this book alot of years back, but its still as fresh as if it was read just yesterday. From then till now, I been wondering what I should believe in. Continue to think there is life in "Afterlife" after I completed my aim in life and done and dusted with it? Or... I would just cease to exist in any form/shape of life?

Perhaps after saying so much, I probably revealed myself to be very self-centered, or rather very scared of death itself. No doubt, I admit that I am afraid of death, but very few can truly claim that they aren't. But as time and events passed by, I felt galvanised by every single failure I encountered, every single mistakes I made, every single gut feeling I experienced, and slowly and surely I would not be afraid as surely one day, it will be my time to go as well.

With that, I leave u guys with a quote, not of my own but of somebody I nvr really know of before. I wish we could do like he said. Haha. Sorry for spoiling your mood if indeed that was the case. Thanks for reading up till here. It's been a bloody long post. Haha

"He who frights and runs away lives to run away another day." - Bob Shaw

went on a stroll through Xiao Gui Lin... in pictures

2005-11-02T16:37:00.001+08:00

Refreshing to stroll through the park. Very scenic, really can help to ease a troubled mind. Haha. I'm just crapping.

Skipped school!~ Wahaha.

2005-11-02T11:36:00.000+08:00

Yoyoyoyo!~

I. Skip. Sch. Again.

YAY!!! Haha. I really dunno why I am so slack regarding 8am school days. Oh well, here I am. Haha. Went Viv's house yesterday, and boy, the food and snacks were great! Thanks Viv! Haha.

Thanks for the great tasting snacks! Don't you feel that you're drooling even though it is just a picture? Haha.

Anyway, as I reached Viv's house, I caught sight of the little garden (or yard as some of you might called it) just infront of the house. It was really a little patch but just have that cosy feeling, that you just feel like lie down there on the grass in the middle of it and suntan ur lazy day away.

This picture don't really do justice to how cosy the actual thing actually feels.

Just picture yourself, on a sunny hot afternoon, you take a beach chair or a rubber pool out into that little patch of grass there and just lay there throughout the afternoon. That is heaven man. Wahaha. Dream on, Gab! Or if you are into astronomy and such, you could actually buy a telescope and place there and stargaze at night... or use it to gaze into some neighbour's house for some of you out there. LOL! I won't mention names. Wahaha.

Anyway, I'm impressed by his house, his family and him as a whole. I wish I could have something like his. Sigh. Haha. Time to work hard man.

I will post something again later in the day. I shall dedicate this post to Viv, the Man! Haha.

Signing off,

Gab, the Boy

YAY! YAY! <----- thanks for the inspiration hehe =x

2005-10-29T00:46:00.000+08:00

Howdy ppl!

I'm gradually loosening my grip on the nozzle. (Of what, I dunno.)

I can feel it.
Hope that this isn't a knee-jerk reaction.
Perhaps it is, perhaps it's not, oh why bother? Haha.

I'm tired... *yawns*

Ho's gonna ask us if we are ready for FYP next week. Oh whatevers-up-there, please gimme a sign. Haha.

Deepavali and Hari Raya coming up next week, so to all my indian and muslim friends, Happy Deepavali and Selamat Hari Raya!~ To the muslims especially, "I'm looking forward to eating with you in the day again! Haha."

Just changed my Video browser to a very cool and sleek black skin, just fit in snugly with my blog template as well. Cheers!~ Cya people.

"Who has to know? Those stuffs I can't deny. I admit. I confess."

Sweet & Sour... Sounds like the Pork dish...

2005-10-25T18:21:00.000+08:00

Leftovers from drafts I tried to combine during the week:

October's almost gone in a glance...

So much time gone, so little done. Or is it just me? Ha. Very soon the new semester will be upon us and the rollercoaster ride of education would start for me again.

Got back my results. Avoided Cs but no As for me this time, just one distinction to be happy about. Anyway, I'm having 2nd thoughts of not going to Uni. Suddenly felt that, because of my very puny amount of knowledge regarding going Uni via you-know-what, is causing me to feel this way.

Ahh. What's the fuss. Things will most probably straighten itself out soon enough.
*Shakes head violently and stomps feet to some techno/trance/hard metal rhythm*

Here's the ranting from today...

New Blog skin... "How? How? How!? Nice!?" *mimics some chirpy teenage girl's voice.

Finally, about a year into the opening of this blog, I finally gave it a makeover. Or shld I say, I finally copied some html codes and modified it.

Not much has happened in life. Life's been sweet & sour. I dunno how to explain. Maybe its just emotions.

Are you really there? Or are you just figments from my memories?
You're just like a hologram. *Blink* You're there. *Blink* You're gone.

Untitled

2005-10-19T19:39:00.000+08:00

Another walk on the tightrope.
Another punch on the face.
Another cut on that flawless skin.
How long could this possibly last?

It was selfish.
It was appalling.
But it was raw.

Feeling more and more upset as hours ticked by
God knows if you felt the same way too

Maybe I shouldn't have asked.
Maybe you shouldn't have told me.
I'm too afraid of what lies ahead.
But I don't want you gone.

Shame is all that I could felt.
Sorry is all that I could muster.

Signed,
Deepest realm inside of me.

Thoughts...

2005-10-17T23:32:00.000+08:00

Another restless day. Another day spent in loneliness. Another day of wild imagination.

Can I just not be Myself for a day?

It's been hard. What is this? Heard you ain't got a girlfriend.

Yea. So? When are you getting one?

I wished I knew the answer. That is sad.

I'm getting desperate. Trouble is, I'm letting the whole world know about it. Haha. Foolish thoughts stashed in my brain all day, just like the dollar bills neatly arranged in those briefcases we see in the movies.

Question: Do you like being Single?
Answer: Yea, I do. -BUT- I rather come in a pair. 2 heads are better than 1.

Take my brain out from my skull now, its most probably fried. I can't think of anything else. I can't concentrate. I'm just reading books furiously, seeking refuge in another world, cos I am so afraid to face reality. Looking at the time I spent on books each day, you would have thought I ate books for lunch for the past 19 years of my life.

Whatever that's up there... I beg you please... Bring her to me. I'll give anything. (Now..havent we heard that countless times in the movies?) Sheesh.

Question: Why am I so worried that I would end up Single?
Answer: I'm scared i would be a stale middle aged man of 30 years who failed to enjoy his life thoroughly during the 20s, the supposedly most vibrant or in other words, most happening period of life ... all this because of you-know-what laa.. Sigh.

Am I'm worrying too much? Am I missing out on alot of stuffs? Things like Partying, Clubbing, all the things that a teenager in Sg shld do...?

I don't want to be a loner ahh... Only child. Only 1 from pri sch to come to my sec sch class. Only 1 from my sec sch to come into my poly class. Only 1 from my yr 1, yr 2 poly class to my yr 3 poly class. Only 1 to sign on for you-know-what. Its been a trend. It STILL is a trend. I don't want it to carry on. Someone rescue me from such a pattern...

I think for now... the chances of Hitler & Stalin -BOTH- seated snugly in my living room chatting seems to be higher than me getting hitched... It really seems that way and it kinda hurt. Big. Time. for Old Sissy Me.

Freak ah.... Gabbeh became a freak liao...

2005-10-16T11:24:00.000+08:00

Ain't got a clue what went through my head when I took this. Guess I ain't got a clue with just about everything in my life.

yet another lazy Sunday...

2005-10-16T10:43:00.000+08:00

Yet another week draws to a close... FYP more or less into the midst of the things... that's the good part, the bad part is that the various inputs that we required for the project are somehow rather difficult to implement... not that we din anticipate this part though.

Weekend pool session was brought forward to yesterday, and I spent a large chunk of time inside there wasting money and time... just hope that this won't come back to haunt me in the future, for slacking so much... After that went to have dinner with Jack, while Iz went to try out Albert's rented Subaru.

Went to West Mall after leaving Beauty World... and walked around the Central and finally the Mall. Been a long time since I'm out walking around busy areas alone. (Most of the time nowadays, I'm either at school or at home alone facing this dumb box.)

Picture this sight, a 1.75m guy with unkempt hair and his half-rimmed specs, wearing a bright orange tee and a light brown bermuda, strolling around in his slippers, with both his hands in his pockets, and walking in a slightly slouched posture. Yeah, that's me weaving through the human traffic there yesterday evening.

Walked around Harvey Norman looking for a set of earpiece foams but found none ; walked into World of Sports searching for a wristband pouch but to no avail; finally walked into Sams Bookshop and hunted for a book. Took this book titled Just Friends by Robyn Sisman. Ain't got a clue who he/she is, but just wanted a romance book, for reasons I'm not quite sure what. Paid 12 bucks for a book by a author I don't know about.

Met Vincent to collect the project toolbox and went home. Once home, totally had no interest in anything... just went into the bedroom and start reading the new book first. After that, I just came out, switch on this box and started surfing around the net. And so on and so forth....

AHHHH. I'm so B-O-R-I-N-G! I just wrote a few paragraphs of absolute diary... Terrible, isn't it? Haha.

Let's just end this post short and sweet.

It's a lazy Sunday morning now, and I'm home alone and about to continue on my project. Bye.

Cracking up? plucks a petal Cracking up not? plucks a petal Cracking up? *plucks last petal...

2005-10-13T20:36:00.000+08:00

Ever felt...

Like you're cracking up?

A period of time whereby you just don't feel like doing anything else but sit down in a spot and think and think and think and ponder about stuffs that probably wouldn't happen at all?

Staying up late at night and watching the same love movies on TV again and again, even though you know the ending having watched it just days earlier?

Indulging in a very bad habit that slowly shreds away whatever remainder of your self-integrity, self-respect and morality?

Felt like letting everything just go in public, just snap infront of people whom you know, and just go practically and literally all bonkers?

I do.

GOAL!!!!!

2005-10-12T09:19:00.000+08:00

Woot! Just remembered that I haven't been here for quite a number of days already. FYP's been on my mind all the way... The day before yesterday was the most horrible I had endured in the whole FYP thingy so far. Always anticipating the worst before meeting the project supervisor, YET when we finally meet up, it was nothing as bad as I had imagined. Haha.

Moving on, we went to watch the movie, GOAL! Haha. A rather nice dreamy movie which kinda reminds you of being a 2 hour long advert for Adidas (though it's not asif I'm bothered by it.) Quite interesting to see the places from Newcastle, England. Especially the big river running through their city and with it, the many bridges, each with their own design and style. It had me thinking what if one day I were to migrate to England...

Migrate!? Did I just said that? Omg... !XOBILE (heehaw) Perhaps it was just the movie painting such a nice scenic picture of England. I don't think I would ever end up in other countries -permenantly-.. just couldn't bear to leave Sunny Sg. (Yah right. Haha.)

Coming back to the movie, *spoilers coming up* it's about this kid, Santiago Munez, growing up from a hard life back in Mexico and Los Angeles, and at a tender age was talent-scouted by a ex Newcastle United player. And then from there, the story took off, rather dreamily, about this kid leaving his home and coming along into England, taking up a trial for NUFC.

It all seems rather simplistic. I mean, which new kid on the block, after winning a penalty for his club on his debut, would go to a party and have DAVID BECKHAM coming up to him and say "You had a great game the other day" ? LOL. It just wouldn't happen in real life, or maybe I'm just clueless with what happen behind the scenes.

Alright, this has totally nothing to do with my dull, stale life at all, but I'm getting overly emotional with a movie, which after all, is just a -movie-. Haha. Ok, I guess I'm running out of things to say and I'm about to go to school to continue work with FYP now, so I'll cya in a couple of days, same place different time! Haha crap.

"90 percent of the things we worry about, won't happen!"

tests... tests.. tests

2005-10-07T20:38:00.000+08:00

Your Birthdate: September 21

Being born on the 21st day of the month (3 energy) is likely to add a good bit of vitality to your life.
The energy of 3 allows you bounce back rapidly from setbacks, physical or mental.
There is a restlessness in your nature, but you seem to be able to portray an easygoing, "couldn't care less" attitude.

You have a natural ability to express yourself in public, and you always make a very good impression.
Good with words, you excel in writing, speaking, and possibly singing.
You are energetic and always a good conversationalist.

You have a keen imagination, but you tend to scatter your energies and become involved with too may superficial matters.
Your mind is practical and rational despite this tendency to jump about.
You are affectionate and loving, but very sensitive.
You are subject to rapid ups and downs.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.

In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.

You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is comforting. You crave a relationship where you always feel warmth and love.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.

In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Yet another test...

2005-10-06T21:04:00.000+08:00

I'm like treating my blog as if it is some treasure chest or something, keep coming back and updating it.. wahaha.. yet another test... Hmm, the test results seems to be quite true wahaha. I dunno. Perhaps I'm just a no hoper... lol.

"The self-esteem is getting lower and lower, what is happening to me ?"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Very Stable

You scored 22 paranioa, 43 openness, and 90 self awareness!

You are aware of what you feel even though you might not feel like sharing everything with your partner. You also are very trusting in your partner and confident in your relationship. Your relationships will be very stable.

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 69% on paranioa

You scored higher than 29% on openness

You scored higher than 56% on self awareness

The How Emotionaly Stable Are You Testhttp://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=8515990278987964630

Day 4... Endless Love from The Myth...

2005-10-06T17:56:00.000+08:00

Day 4...

Din really do much today in school... practically went to school to waste the electricity and air-con there. Nothing to allay my fears at all. Haha. Oh well, at least we should be getting our long-awaited EEPROM tomorrow. That's a plus amid all the negatives....

Had a knack of picking off and looping songs continually from wherever I went for the past 3 days, Haha. 1st it was Crowded House's Don't Dream It's Over, then it was Robbie William's Tripping, followed by a long time chinese classic by Wu Qi Xian, Tai Sha. Today it was Jackie Chan and Kim's Endless Love from The Myth...

Just felt like posting that song's lyrics here complete with translation... =)

成龙 (J.C.) ：

解开我最神秘的等待
jie kai wo zui shen mi de deng dai
Release me from this mysterious waiting

星星坠落风在吹动
xing xing zhui luo feng zai chui dong
The stars are falling; the wind is blowing.

终于再将你拥入怀中
zhong yu zai jiang ni yong ru huai zhong
Finally I can hold you in my arms.

两颗星颤抖
liang ke xin chan dou
Two hearts beating together.

相信我不变的真心
xiang xin wo bu bian de zhen xin
Believe me that my heart is never-changing

千年等待有我承诺
qian nian deng dai you wo cheng nuo
Waiting a thousand years. You have my promise

无论经过多少的寒冬我绝不放手
wu lun jing guo duo shao de han dong wo jue bu fang shou
Despite the many bitter winters, I will never let you go.

金喜善 Kim (sung in Korean):

现在紧抓住我的手闭上眼睛
Close your eyes and tightly grab my hands.

请你回想起过去我们恋爱的日子
Please recall the past - the days we were in love.

我们是因为太爱
We loved each other too much,

所以更使得我们痛苦我们连“爱你”这一句话都无法讲
It is sorrowful that we can't even say "I love you."

J.C:

每一夜被心痛穿越
mei yi ye bei xin tong chuan yue
Every night my heart aches.

思念永没有终点
si nian yong mei you zhong dian
I never stop thinking of you.

早习惯了孤独相随
zao xi guan le gu du xiang sui
I am used to being alone for such a long time

我微笑面对
wo yong wei xiao mian dui
And I face it with a smile.

相信我你选择等待
xiang xin wo ni xuan zhe deng dai
Believing in me, you choose to wait.

再多苦痛也不闪躲
zai duo ku tong ye bu shan duo
Even though it's painful, I won't leave.

只有你的温柔能解救无边的冷漠
zhi you ni de wen rou neng jie jiu wu bian de leng mo
Only your tenderness can save me from the endless cold.

(Kim's Korean part)

Both J.C. and Kim:

让爱成为你我心中那永远盛开的花
rang ai cheng wei ni wo xin zhong na yong yuan sheng kai de hua
Let love be a blossoming flower in our hearts.

穿越时空绝不低头永不放弃的梦
chuan yue shi kong jue bu di tou yong bu fang qi de meng
We can pass through time, never bowing our heads,And never giving up our dream.

(Kim's Korean part)

Both:

让爱成为你我心中那永远盛开的花
rang ai cheng wei ni wo xin zhong na yong yuan sheng kai de hua
Let love be a blossoming flower in our hearts.

(Kim in Korean):

我们千万不要忘记我们的约定
We will never ever forget our promise.

Both:

唯有真爱追随你我穿越无尽时空
wei you zhen ai zhui sui ni wo chuan yue wu jin shi kong
Only true love follows us as we pass through time.

(Kim in Korean):

我们连“爱你”这一句话都无法讲
We can't even say "I love you."

J.C:

爱是心中为一不变美丽的神话
ai shi xin zhong wei yi bu bian mei li de shen hua
The love we have in our hearts is the only never-changing myth.

I painstakingly compiled this from 2 sets of translations, just to fill up my blog!

Haha... Anyway, won't it be nice if I could find someone out there to share my life for a long, long time? *Smacks forehead* What am I saying? Haha... but this kind of people getting harder and harder to come by...

With that, I shall sign off... May you people find the One as soon as possible! Haha. Cheerios!~

"I don't wanna be 2nd best to you, I don't wanna be a toy to you, I'm not to be played as you wish... I want the best, just like you and everybody else."

busy...

2005-10-04T22:56:00.000+08:00

Day 2 into my FYP rush...
I'm already starting to feel really tired having to wake up early (even just for 2 days! LOL) haha. But at least I guess there is progress finally.

My brain's stuck in 15 inches of thick imaginary snow... so, Cya.

"再说你也不会懂, 心再痛你能做什么, 不再将自己深锁错了又错..."

Lol. I think I'm too honest with some of my Answers... rofl

2005-10-02T17:38:00.000+08:00

The Boy Next Door
Random Gentle Love Dreamer (RGLDm)

Kind, yearning, playful, you are The Boy Next Door. You're looking for real Love, a lot like girls do. It might not be manly, but it's sweet.

We think the next three years will be very exciting and fruitful ones for you. Your spontaneous, creative side makes you a charming date, and we think you have a horny side just waiting to shine. Or glisten, rather. You enter new relationships unusually hopeful, and the first moments are especially glorious. If you've had some things not work out before, so what.

On paper, most girls would name the Boy Next Door as their ideal mate. In the real world, however, you're often passed over for more dangerous or masculine men. You're the typical "nice guy:" without just a touch of cockiness, you're doomed with girls. A shoulder to cry on? Okay, sure. But never a penis to hold.

More than any other type, Boys Next Door evolve as they get older. As we said, many find true love, but some fail miserably in the search. These tarnished few grow up to be The Men Next Door, who are creepy as hell, offering backrubs to kids and what not.

ALWAYS AVOID: The Nymph

CONSIDER: The Maid of Honor, The Peach

Link: The Dating Persona Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.

Exams Over!

2005-10-01T21:34:00.000+08:00

Yippeee Yahhoooo! Exams over! I'm happy~!

Haha.. I guess the above tells it's own story already. Parents' been away for almost 6 days now... My 'ordeal' being at home alone is almost over... (Haha.. I wished it could last longer =x)

The whole week home alone has been a blast. I got used to coming home to an empty house at night, and staying up late alone till the wee hours... with no one to nag me in the ears or keep an eye on me. Haha. I was still panicking ahead of this week, what might happen if I couldn't handle the 'being alone and helpless' bullshit, but well, so far so good! It was as if I embraced this sort of independence with both hands! Haha...

This was as close to ideal as the ideal life I want. Just to let you know, I want to be a typical Yuppie if possible, with my own apartment, a games room with my very own pool table, a small kitchen for me to cook food for my guests, and finally a living room with a projecter screen as my TV and a comfy sofa to snug up with my loved ones. Haha.. alright alright..enough of daydreaminG~!

I been eating junk food for almost the whole of this week, munching all around. Mee Goreng, Calamari Rings, fast food... now is that heaven or what? The 8 scoops Earthquake I shared with you particularly stood out. Haha.. perhaps it's just so normal for you people..

Spent yesterday and today morning hosting Wee at my hse. Haha.. another 'first' in letting a friend stay overnight at my house, albeit with no permission from my parents.. (Who Cares? =x)

Then towards the afternoon, went to Century Pool with Bert and Deez, and whack clay balls all the way till the evening. Haha. That's SO my boring life isn't it? Tml morning most likely pool again, with my Cuz this time and tml night meeting up for dinner with a few of the old sec sch guys... got a feeling it will be a laughter-first-food-second kinda night... which shld be just great! Haha.

Next Monday onwards, I think I will dedicate all my time to FYP, i think its long overdue to officially get started on it but Hey! Better late than never! Wahaha. I can't foresee the future regarding this though... but I am ready to give my all to produce some decent work out. Looking forward to this challenge. =) Alright, thats all for this update, its gettin' kinda long alrdy. Cya people and take lotsa care! =)

"I dun dare to give it a thought, I dun dare to dream, I wish there was a fairytale ending, but too often, Reality spoils everything."

another PDT

2005-09-23T21:47:00.000+08:00

I borrowed materials from Yx... haha... *ahem* lol. Okay.. I went to do yet another Personality Disorder test... and I seriously think the results below are rather disturbing... I din receive any High rating for anything, but still "Moderate" for almost everything is quite bad alrdy. Haha, you guys take the test and see how? LoL.. Another boring post done! =)

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Schizoid Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Schizotypal Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Antisocial Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Borderline Personality Disorder:	Low
Histrionic Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Narcissistic Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Avoidant Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Dependent Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	Moderate
-- Take the Personality Disorder Test -- -- Personality Disorder Info --

12 wishes on my Bdae, one for each month? haha

2005-09-22T12:38:00.000+08:00

In the midst of my examination period... My birthday came! Yeayy.. how happy. duh.

This year was just like any other year. One dinner with parents, and 1 cake. 1 Wallet as prezzie, and yup, thats about it. Gab... why do u hafta whine even on your birthday? wahaha.

Okay...i shall move on to what my post title is about...
I received 12 wishes from the 20th till the 22nd... I shall try and recall them in a chronicle way...
On the 20th, I received wishes from Shaz and Nora online... then next up are Mum and Dad... during the dinner, then we went to buy the Cake and the cake shop uncle was just being nice, he wished me too. Thats 4 on the 20th. On the 21st, first thing i woke up to... was Dee's sms. Afterwhich, I went out to study... while on my way there, the 2 ladies from Habbo sms me seperately, Jas and Star, thanks. Then on my way back, Liz sms-ed me one of the crappiest ever wishes I ever received (that was, until i saw Wee Leong's).

As the night went on, T.V. msged me online "Eh bdae boy, you there?", but din wish me... haha... not counted. Yongsheng was next to sms me, which was a rather pleasant surprise. Followed by Kelvin, who was about 1 hour late, that is another wicked one... I think I was being mean to him by replying so crudely. Sorry dude, if you ever read this.

Finally, came to today... first thing in the morning, another sms from Wee Leong finally. He is about 2 hrs 58 mins late. His wishes was in line with some of the comments he posted on the blog in the past, very embarrassing to say it out but funny to laugh at. (We shall leave it as that. LOL)

That's 12 in all, one for each month, just to keep me happy.

Just a note, today is Dee's Birthday... tml is KaiLing's Birthday.... Happy Birthday to you two! Welcome to the Club! =)

"Did i just came here to post all this bullshit? *pinches cheek* Yea."

Busy busy busy.

2005-09-13T20:04:00.000+08:00

Left 1 project , 2 reports to go!

Exams coming up the next 2 weeks!

Wish me luck!

"and YOU! Be happy yah? Guess you'll never know whose suffering along with you when you're down."

just did a personality defect test...

2005-09-07T01:23:00.000+08:00

Schoolyard Bully

You are 28% Rational, 57% Extroverted, 57% Brutal, and 42% Arrogant.

You are the Schoolyard Bully! You focus more on feelings than rationality, and thus tend to be driven by your emotions. You are probably easy to anger or annoy, for instance. You are also an extrovert who wouldn't mind having a lot of attention, although you may not always get it. Another character trait you possess is your brutality, manifested by the fact that you tend to be aggressive and do not care about the well-being of others. Also, you exhibit signs of humility, leading one to conlude that you are actually insecure, because very few people are truly humble AND brutal. Thus, like any schoolyard bully, you seek constant attention for yourself and have no issues with administering beatings because you are quite emotional and easy to upset. Not only that, but your insecurity may be a prime motivation for your brutality. As psychologists have noted, most schoolyard bullies only pick on others because they have a negative self-image. This could possibly be true of you. In short, your personality defects are your brutality, extroversion, irrationality, and your possible insecurity. Go pick on someone your own size!

To put it less negatively:

1. You are more INTUITIVE than rational.

2. You are more EXTROVERTED than introverted.

3. You are more BRUTAL than gentle.

4. You are more HUMBLE than arrogant.

Compatibility:

Your exact opposite is the Haughty Intellectual. (Bullies like to beat up nerds, after all.)

Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Bitch-Slap, the Capitalist Pig, and the Class Clown.

If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.

The other personality types:

The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

a Song....translation? =x

2005-09-07T00:23:00.000+08:00

Reports are boring the hell outta me! Wish I could get away from reality... Wee

Just felt like posting this song onto the blog... its something that I would like to loosely translate.

(I shall give a special mention to a good friend, TV, for sending me this song, and THEN provided me with the lyrics upon my request... even if there's a few mistakes here and there. Would like to express my gratitude to him for saving my ass on alot of occasions throughout my years in Poly. Always remain as friends yah? Tell me if you ever read this =] )

Try changing the codings for this page if you can't read the chinese characters. If you really wanna read the chinese lyrics, drop me a message, I would printscreen specially for you. Haha. Asif anybody needs it.

Alright, here goes nothing!

我想听你说 by 蔡淳佳
I wanna hear you say by Joi Chua

喜欢到底怎么说
你用微笑来问我
假如你要靠近我
别让空气太沉默

"How do you express ur feelings to the one that you adore?"
You asked me with a smile
If you wanna get closer to me
Don't ever let depression get to us

幸福到底怎么说
你用心跳来问我
假如你要珍惜我
说出来温暖得多

"How do you express your happiness?"
You asked me with a heartbeat
If you cherish me
It would be better if you say it all out

真心话要勇敢说
属于你得要把握
我想听你说
好不好　笑一笑
拉进你和我

One should be brave to say all that's in the heart out
Cherish the things that belongs to you
I wanna hear you say
"Is it alright if you smile alittle?"
Bringing us a step closer to each other

贴心话要开口说
属于你得别错过
只要你肯说
我愿意　很愿意
未来岁月一起过

Sweet nothings should be exchanged
Shouldn't miss what belongs to you
As long as you're willing to say
"I do, I really do"
And we will live happily ever after

Sorry for the very poor translation. Had plenty of problems coming up with the right words. This is my own effort, so dun mind yah? =D

And to the rest of you... just don't bombard me when you next see me, alright? Cya.

mentally tired, physically tired.

2005-09-02T10:15:00.000+08:00

blog! I'm here again.

This time I'm typing this when I'm supposed to be in school. I skipped classes! =O
Nothing new laa... I always skip sch nowadays. What's wrong with me? I never felt so lazy during all my time in Poly until now.

Ever felt like not going out of the house at all when you woke up? It's somewhat like you ain't got the energy to welcome the day into your system. Well, that's what happened. All the reports and stuff seems to take alot out of me. Suddenly i dun feel that adept at handling pressure anymore. (Was I ever adept at it? lol.) Do alittle bit of things then start to complain. That's me nowadays.

I can't think... I can't summon energy to drag myself out of this chair and start changing for school. Someone dump me in the washing machine and wake me up please. Put me on a knife and cut me into half. Put me into the mixer and grind me to the very basic composite of me. Okay, I made myself sound like a Onion. Gee. Gotta stop. Gotta pick myself up. Gotta go. Bye.

"Usahlah kau bersedih
Dihadapanmu aku hadir
Memadam resah dan curiga dari hatimu
Apakah kali ini
Bisa kau tolak dan berlari
Setelah aku menanamkan azimatku " -- Spider

feeling terrible

2005-08-31T11:57:00.000+08:00

blog! blog!... I only run to you when I'm emotionally down...

Today, I finally found the words I want to say it out but never could... I was chatting to YZ, and the following words just sorta tumbled out...

YZ: whether things remain the same or become worse or become better....it depends on a few factors one of which is yurself
Me: im so confused... im like waiting for something to happen
Me: and i know it wun..
YZ: ahhh....
Me: things like
Me: one fine day...my parents turned up and say to me.. "youre allowed to marry a muslim girl"
Me: or walla! one day i woke up and found myself with darker skin and in a muslim home
Me: OR... she woke up and found herself with brighter skin and in a chinese home
Me: things like that never did happen.. never happen... never will in the future.
YZ: .....
Me: ok apart from 1st one.. it might in the future
YZ: exactly.....
YZ: so make the best out of things
Me: if i aged 50, and still a bachelor

Kinda cheesy, but that is how horrid I feel now. I dun wanna jump the gun... but on the other hand, I wished I was something, someone, somebody else.... who could make just the special someone very happy.

"Last night I tried but I couldn’t sleep
thoughts of you were in my head
I was lonely and I needed you next to me
Life is harder since you left
I never meant to do you wrong
And now all is said and done
I hope you wont be gone too long, Nooo"

-- Lemar

several hours before school reopening...

2005-05-31T02:01:00.001+08:00

Hello people.. back here in the middle of the night at around 2am... some 11 hours before school starts at 1pm.. heheh.. Surprised to see a gush of comments following my last post, really... din
expect some of you guys to actually read it. ( And yea Carine, pleasantly surprised =D )

*tap tap tap* hmmm.. let's get back down to blogging business eh... Well, its officially the day my 3rd year in poly starts... Most of my ex classmates have already started their sch term today, and yet I din go sch today... no classes every Monday.. woo. No more Monday Sucks for me...
heh.

Got into the CST (Computer Systems Technology) specialization... Guess you guys could call me up whenever you got problems with your PCs. Just browsed through my Recommended Textbks under the module... it's basically hardware, and repairing, upgrading etc. Finally, one of my childhood dreams is about to be realised... I can officially be classified as a Computer "Expert"! YAY...haha I'm so duh...

Updates on life... hmm... been going to Sim Lim Square quite alot these days, mainly due to the Final Year Project, and I just changed my Mobo to my friend's one. I'm currently on a 2.0Ghz , 768 MB ram, 120 GB Hdd (Partitioned into 3) computer. Nothing BIG to brag about, but its still a breath of fresh air for me after being stuck on the 1.7Ghz, 512MB ram for sooo long.

Oh yea, been chomping quite a bit on food. Just about anything I could get my hands on end up in my stomach. Heez. Just today alone, I eaten Choc cake in the morning; Fried Economical Beehoon/Mee with Egg, Veggies + Popiah + Bandung + Barley at Tekka Market in the afternoon; Ice Kacang with Honey Sea Coconut added at the SLS Foodcourt in the late afternoon; and finally, Fried Beef Rice + Barley at Sakura restaurant opposite City Hall... =X Oops.. abit too much for a day. Wahaha. Gaining weight in the process... Sheesh... Gab -tsk tsk-.

I went Sim Lim, Funan, and Peninsula Shopping Centre today...nothing much gained on the
FYP perspective of things... but gotta see alot of nice punk clothings in Peninsula and I bought Maroon5's old CD at 9.90 at the Sembawang Music Store at Funan.

I also gotta see alot of nice punk clothings in Peninsula Shopping Centre. Tattoos, Guitars, Loud (in terms of colours) clothings, soccer figurines, soccer jerseys, and just about every single kind of up to date apparel inside that outdated shopping mall. For those who haven't been there, you guys should go take a look, though some of us (like one of my friend today) might not like it because of the slightly sleazy atmo there.

Came back home to slack, played Footie Manager 2005, its like kinda -reinvented- for me, ever since that day i figured out how to fix up my tactics to become more fail-proof... and slack all the way here until now... this very words. Haha... I dunno what to say le... My mind's a piece of white foolscap, with the monotonous word of "SCHOOL" written in caps and bold on that. Hehe, it's that horrible alright. Wah... looking the scrollbar getting smaller and smaller with every Enter i keyed, reminded me that it's time to stop... alright stop I shall, till the next update, Cya everyone and take care... C-H-I-L-L!!~! =D

"I know I don't know you, but I want you so bad..." -- Maroon 5

Squeezing my brain juices....

2005-05-15T23:24:00.000+08:00

Howdy everyone...

I just removed the hit counters... its been giving me crosses for the past few weeks, I guess I just hafta do without it, so you people.. make some sounds... its kinda depressing looking at 0 comments all over my blog.. haha. Never mind.. think no one got anything to say about my posts.

It seems that everytime I'm moody or had nothing to do, then I will reluctantly come here and give inputs. Hmm. Can anyone tell me how do you get over a person whom you like, but can almost never get? Hahaz... My thoughts are killing me (not that I have any suicidal thoughts), but its depressing me out.

Went to Esplanade to kill time yesterday... took one photo of the CBD "skyscrapers"... Singapore is so boring you know... not much places to go...

Daydreaming and idling all the time infront of this idiot box... I'm going crazy!~ Hahahz... Pathetic Gab, get a life...

"I can't deny the way that I'm feeling... It's true." -- Craig Davids

boring boring holidays.

2005-05-11T19:07:00.000+08:00

Hello everyone!~

Its been a while since I last posted anything at all on this blog. Well..for starters, I just figured out how to post images onto the blog using BloggerBot.. *pops champagne*... duh...

Okay okay... let's see what I have with me on my mind today... First of all, it's the freaking School Holidays.... yay... and I'm rotting at home 24/7 until 30th May... *frantically praying for that date to come quickly* Haha.. exams over, now waiting for the young ones (secondary school) to finish their exams, so I can have company on Habbo~! Haha.. im sooo childish.

Exams results came out a few days ago, I must say I'm not very happy with my results, but my Maths gave me a big, big surprise... (Just like when Senegal won France 1-0 in the World Cup 2002 opener) I scored a A!~ haha... but other modules to disappoint me are mainly CA and ACS... =\

Moving on, I started going for Driving Theory lessons... I picked Auto Transmission... but did i make the wrong choice? Haha.. so many of my friends learning Manual Transmission instead, makes me feel if there was any point getting a AT license and not being able to drive any large vehicles or flashy sports car... but then again I don't think I will ever get to touch such vehicles. The lessons are pretty boring... the instructors aren't cut out to be speaking in a classroom. They should get those kind of full time speakers to teach the classes, given the obscene amount of money they got from the -members- of the Driving Centre.

My blog is becoming a RANT.. haha.. how sad. Spoilt the whole blog with my ranting. Anyway... maybe its time I start a time chronicle of my everyday life, lol, so to keep me going here. Till the next check in... take care and ciaoz =)

"I gotta keep it real now, cos' on a one to ten, she's a certified twenty" -- Usher

2005-05-11T14:56:00.000+08:00

That's me in lecture.... smiling like a bloody idiot.. lolz

rainy Sunday...

2005-03-06T14:33:00.000+08:00

Hey people..

Feeling quite bored at home , so popped in to increase the number of posts. Yet again, its been a long time since I last blogged. (Dating back to January 16th i believe...). Apologies, as usual -hee-

So...let's see.. what have I gotta say this time round. Alright. First an update on my life. The mid semester test whizzed by without much problems. I finished my maths tutorials for the first time in my poly life, I more or less understood what all the modules were talking abt (albeit after some last minute studies in the week before the Exams...).

Considering the fact that this time, the study week before the exam, is actually the Chinese New Year period. I must consider myself to be exceptionally lucky to come out of the week without any illness from eating all those goodies, and managing to avoid scoring under 70 for all the papers =D. *heez*

Talking about the Chinese New Year, it was such a bore compared to those times in the past. I don't feel any excitement building up inside me as it draws nearer. Even when I was going around visiting the relatives, I really dun feel the festive spirit. Perhaps it was the thought of the exams looming just around the corner... or is it that I have grown up and no longer feels attached to the idea of going around people's house, put on a smiley face and collecting red packets? Either way, the period passes without any incident. I even met Evil Aunty, but we didnt talk more than few sentences , which was just as well.

Recently, the pool fever in me has been picking up. I starting to feel that I know quite a bit about the game again. Hahaz... but just about any Tom, Dick and Harry can claim that they know alot about pool too... so, to prove it to you... come play a game with me. Hahaz... im so duh...

Anyway, the San Miguel Asian Tour has kicked off again this year. First stop, Singapore Suntec City... I went there yesterday in the hope of catching a glimpse of those pool legends in the flesh, but ended up reaching there and seeing a long queue ahead of me. It seems pretty weird to me that the exhibition hall, being a exhibition hall, would allow more spectators to watch the table. However, the organisers seems to think its OK for the tables to occupy just 1/12 the size of the exhibition hall, and causing many of the pool enthusiasts to turn around and go home. (And that includes me) That leaves a sour taste in my mouth. For me to travel to Suntec takes alot of time, and to go there without fulfilling my purpose... its double whammy.

I dun really have much to add on. Haha...and im rushing to go off to play pool. The rain's stopped, gotta get out and travel before it resumes. So... see ya all and take care.

Hello Every1!!!

2005-01-16T18:24:00.000+08:00

hAhahz... sURpRisE!!!

I'm back after a long, long, loooOOooong time. HAhaz.. It's January already... New school term already started way back in December... so boRing rights... haha. Anyway, I did well for the MST last sem, 4 As and 2 Bs... Anyway, as usual, I got not much to talk about.. -hAhaz-

Let's see, what can I tell you all. Life's been boring bah. It's getting really really repetitive... Monday - Friday schooling, and the starting time for each day is either 8am or 9am.. damn crappy eh... Then on Thursdays, there is always a 3 hour break before the Financial Management tutorial. During this break, I would always go to Snookerium with Phyo, Faisal and Vince to play pool. As for weekends, as usual la, MORE pool...

Oh yah... My social circle is really very small now... Wee and Yang already went into N.S... there's only a handful of guys who I would ask to go out now.. haha.. You guys here, jio me go out when your free perhaps? -Hahz- O yah... I'm looking for a girlfriend nowadays, if there are any interested applicants, please come and look for me yah? -LOL- I must be the only person crazy enough to say this on a Blog...

Hmmz, are there any of you out there willing to go exercise with me? I need to shed some excess -burden- off my body... haha. My BMI is a shocking 26... I need to lose about 6 KG to get back to acceptable BMI... It's not only for reducing the BMI bah, I'm also going to join NS soon, I'm beginning to be worried about my fitness, shld that day come. Sigh.

I also abit concerned at how easily I'm falling sick these days. It's like after eating abit of heaty stuff (Chips, fried stuff, or even peanut butter) then I can expect a sore throat le. It's so horrible to think that my body's tolerance level has dropped to such a poor state, considering the fact that I'm able to stand alot more last time. Gotta do something about it, but its always the case of the idea being there but not going about to execute it. -Sheesh- I'm self-contradicting myself here, hAhaz..

Finally, Final Year Project is almost upon my batch. I'm quite stunned at the manner my class is splitting up due to the Project groupings. People, whom others thought, are supposed to be together, didn't get together. Then there are the few slackers in the class whom nobody wants. I felt so helpless as a class rep... I can't solve the mess. Ended up, everyone's keeping quiet and pissed about the whole thing. I just hope things would sort themselves out, and the class would get back to their usual bubbly self.

As a whole, my life seems to be entering a very important phase. My teenage years are almost over, and it is starting to feel like HALF my life has gone. Where's the girlfriend that guys my age are supposed to have? What's my aim and ambition in life? Did i make the right step in signing on? How would I fare for my 3rd year? So many questions, yet so little answers. I really hope I could end up on the right side of things...

Sheesh... feeling slightly moody after typing all these.. shall leave this as it is now... Cya guys, and Take Care~! =D

another quarrel...

2004-10-07T22:25:00.000+08:00

it's slowly becoming a daily affair...

this pesky idiot... normally would fetch mum back from work, and usually after quarrels, would felt that it is inappropriate to fetch her back from work... Today i just got exceptionally worked up... normally i would have gritted my teeth and kept quiet. Well...

Not today.

I questioned his decision, in which he came in with his now-usual words in quarreling. Money. Mum and I never helped him, and when he 'was rich' (it was a one-off) , he paid $1000 to help Mum get a Rolex... ($1000 is just 1/5 of the price of a Rolex, mind you) ... kept reminding me of the fact, asif I never paid $1000 alongside him. I spent $1000 TOO. And no one ever heard me mentioning it as much as him. It's horrible. Then everyday keep dwelling on the 300 bucks he gave Mum as monthly groceries & essential items. HELLO? Yes, you DID gave the money, but you just took the rest of your pay and dump it at the racecourse. FAILED to settle the bills, and came home and ASKED for money! Those 300 bucks would end up, BACK in YOUR pocket! So what the F*** are you driving at here!?

I wished these could get in his head. But such unreasonable people won't have these sink into their heads. As a wife and son, we are not entitled to go around borrowing money from others and comes back home and hand them over to a overdemanding husband-cum-Dad! If anybody needs to borrow money to come and help out the household, its gotta be the man in charge himself! Instead, he only borrowed for his own 'recreational activity'... how pathetic can it get?

I told him off, anybody who gives him money and help him out (Nasty Aunt), he would say that person good. Well, not surprisingly, he agreed too. (Finally, something logical worked out.) I just wished he heard what Nasty Aunt said. But i guess to him, Sister is much more closer than Son...

Oh well, at least something came out good of this quarrel. I managed to squeeze in the phrase "then i shalln't go to the wedding this Sunday then...", and to which, he replied with a almost emphatic 'OK!'..."You and your Mum won't need to go! I don't need you two anyway..."

Yea right. No one's there to see you gamble. Good time to splash out the cash again, and gamble with Brothers and Sisters who by now, SHOULD be looking down on him. (Maybe they already looked down on my family for a long time already... all thanks to this useless bum.)

At this point... I would wish to vow that:

1. I would never ever gamble.
2. I would treat my future wife and kids much, much, much MORE better than my Dad.
3. I will spend my money wisely.

Of course, no one would know what will happen in the future, but I dun really envision any problems in keeping these vows. For the meantime, I just gotta hang in there... and wish that someday, a miracle would happen.

I dunwanna HATE my Dad...but with each passing day, the possibility of it becoming a reality increases...

Sorry issues...

2004-10-05T22:42:00.000+08:00

After a long layoff... I'm finally back... but this time I got a whole new chunk of complaints to file... I'm typing this while fighting back tears welling in my eyes...

So, I'm finally 18, but nothing else changes. Dad's still a persistent die-hard gambler, and whole family's still trying to make ends meet. 3 months of bills, SCV, elec & water, SingTel, SingNet... all unpaid... it's not the first time... Today SCV cuts off tranmission to my tv... back to those free-to-air channels for a while at least... Kinda expecting the rest of the essentials stuff to be cut off one by one...

Mum got Dad to go over to Aunt's house to try ang get her to 'talk sense' into him... However, unfortunately (for me & Mum), it didnt have the desired results... Aunt decided to help him CLEAR THE BILLS. WTF!?!

I mean, here you are, trying to help talk some sense into Dad, and instead of reprimanding him, you gone ahead to help him. Never mind abt that....

So Dad comes home in a understandably happy mood. But he's got a bombshell for me tho... I'm expected to pay my own SingNet bills from nxt months onwards. Sheesh, that got me into a state of frenzy. I raised my voice and argued with him... if only he stopped gambling.. we weren't be in such a terrible state. Issues regarding him gambling... he kept saying "I wouldn't gamble, I promise!"... but i just refused to accept it. Reason? For the past 18 years, he had said that for quite a number of times... everytime after such a promise, within a few months, he's back to his old habits again. No wonder ppl say old habits die hard...

Eventually i broke down (very proned to crying)... then Mum phoned Aunt... and tried to ask her how come he came back from her house in this kind of attitude... Dad then snatched the phone and gave his version of the story...before i stumbled my way to the phone and try to utter a few words into the phone...

Nope. I wasn't going to be allowed to say even a few words, Aunt's mouth just poured open and launched a tirade... I was on the receiving end. I bet she wanted to scold my Mum this way but held back, and saved the bit for me. "You all ah...never help your dad, never give him money, end up I hafta help him foot the bills (stupid la, who ask you to? no one force you anyway), and blablablabla... you HATE your father! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TALK TO ME!"

OUCH. (to be continued..)

Well into August...

2004-08-11T17:55:00.000+08:00

Hullo everyone...

and first of all... a belated "Happy National Day, Singapore!"

Ok, with that out of the way, I can start crapping on this blog again. Let's see... A few more weeks to the first exam period of the new school term... already I'm feeling the stress of it already. So far, I have not really done any real studying on the 4 subjects that I will be tested on... Confidence or just plain lazy? I guess it's the latter. -heh-

I didn't go to school today... another fine example of my laziness, I woke up at 9.30am... took a look at the clock, and went to sleep again, despite the fact that my lessons start at 10am. Haha...and eventually I decided to skip the day altogether. (Lazy...lazy...lazy...ZzzzZz)

Anyone watched the National Day parade on Monday? Tell me about it if you could =D. I missed it. Was out watching Collateral at West Mall... Crap show if you ask me, the whole 2 hour show was just about 1 long night, during which a murderer goes around killing his targets...

Looking at this blog of mine (not just this post, but almost most of them), makes me feel that my life is pretty empty. Empty in the sense that, there isn't much interesting to fill up here. (I have mentioned that plenty of time... sorry if you find it irritatin')

Oh yah...the English Premier League is about to be back in full swing... and Arsenal whetted everyone's appetite for it by winning Manchester United in the Community Shield in style. Well, you could say it was an understrength Man Utd who was on the receiving end of things, but if you look at the Arsenal's substitutes bench, could you have said that Arsenal is at full strength? Haha, to that, my answer is a emphatic No! Anyway, Reyes really stood out ahead of anyone on the pitch that day by miles, and i feel we can keep up with Chelsea without having to spend 192 million on players in just 2 seasons. Arsenal to retain their title? I bet my whole house on it. =D

With that , I shall sign off here. Hope to bring something more interesting here in the not so distant future. Heh.

A rare "post" out of the blue...

2004-07-18T23:31:00.000+08:00

Hello everyone...

I guess I'm inept at maintaining a blog...so I guess all of you out there need not check back here very often. I will update this when I really have something to say... Too many times I been here to type in a new post, and too many time I deleted everything i typed and log out without posting anything... so here I am... posting up occasionally...

Ok...quick update...

2 weeks into the new school term... Nothing changed... Everyone still roughly the same, except for changes in appearance..(Notably Norezan and Jason) Anyway, got quite a number of female lecturers for this semester, a refreshing change from last year... but nothing to cheer about really... they aren't that nice anyway. Oh yah...Mass lecture... very different from what I expected it to be, to be honest... Those nasty "timetable schedule-er" assigned one of the oldest lecture theatre for my class... one that doesn't have any aircon controls!! (I bet they pipe out some cold air from the library next block and transferred it into the lecture theatre.)

Enough about school... nothing much to talk about anyway. I have not been doing any exercises for the past 2 weeks? Ever since the last soccer outing 2 weeks ago, I have hardly any need to do any running. But... playing pool has been my favourite pastime for the past week... played a total of 4 sessions. Neat.

Whats there to talk about? Hmmm.. oh yah, for anyone who is interested in space exploration by NASA and such... Cassini Huygen has gone into the orbit of Saturn about 2 weeks ago and has started to take photo of the friendly ringed giant... haha... as if anyone wants to know this shit on a Blog...

Movies... I just watched Spiderman 2 yesterday with Lao Ah Leong... Great special effects... those computer animations as usual... watching it, even though I know it's artificial...it still looks good. Storyline abit rigid in my opinion... the movie is like its trying very hard to follow the comicbook (anyone who seen the comicbook shld know what I'm driving at..)

World Pool Championship...Anyone watched it? I'm typing this during the final of the tourney... Alex Pegulayan is leading after being 5-11 down, its amazing how he plays 9-ball so well... and so casually too... this guy just looks so friendly when he is playing pool and enjoys making the crowd laugh too. If only I could play pool like him... I would die for that... haha...

Been feeling funny for the past week, feeling something is missing from my life but I couldn't pinpoint it out... No...not to you prying eyes here.. (haha!) but I will reveal all if I find out what it is...

Anyway, thanks for reading this, cya guys , i gotta go sleep, not feeling too well with my eye twitching lately... so cya and take care~ :D

F.O.P... zzzz and its July!

2004-07-02T16:23:00.000+08:00

Sorry people... didnt update for the whole WEEK... heez. Was too tired by the time I reach home in the evening, and spent the whole night sleeping away for most of the week.

Anyway, was busy with the F.O.P, everyday woke up at 6.30am, reach school by 8am, and events just start rolling one by one, non-stop. On the first day of F.O.P, I was deployed at the entrance of the Convention centre, ushering the Freshies in. I was appalled by the sheer number of newbies coming in and searching for their classes on the noticeboards. Each of them has the -hope- of coming to poly to have a good time on their faces... Not much trouble ushering the thousand freshies into the Hall, with the exception of several blur-looking guys. Not much good looking females either, following the trend of EEE... (the only ones being those from other schools, whom "stumbled" towards the Convention Centre by accident...haha)

The rest of the first day was dedicated to guiding my assigned class on a Campus Tour, not much to talk about on that, just that I had a ex-Bpian in the class, managed to chat him up, nice guy even though I never really knew him while in BP.

F.O.P's 2nd day and 3rd day was dedicated to organising Ice-breaking Workshops for the Freshies. Each day there were two shifts, morning and afternoon. To put it bluntly, it was hard work being a Facilitator. Not only do we have to introduce total strangers to each other and getting them to work in teams, we also have to put up with doing the same thing over and over again for the 2 days. First two classes I took, being inexperienced, wasn't much of a good experience. The Freshies didn't show much appreciation towards us Student Leaders. Things got better for the 3rd and 4th classes on the 2nd day, with some of them saying goodbye and offering some chocolate (that they won from the team games) to me.

It's been a learning experience for me. If I am still a class rep by the end of this Year 2, I can look forward to participating in the F.O.P next year, with much more experience, and knowing what to expect from the Freshies, I most probably could do a much more better job.

Moving to something else thats off topic from F.O.P...

It's July and a whole new school term is starting next week...

Life's being tiring and boring as in line with much of the holidays. (But it's gonna end soon thankfully..)

Euro 2004 semi finals... Portugal won Netherlands and Greece won Czech, the latter being a major upset, setting up a repeat of the opening game as the Final of Euro 2004. Let's just hope that Portugal would turn up for this one.

Activities... not much to report on this, just that I'm going Cashew Heights for soccer again later in the evening...

That's it for now, I will try my best NOT to neglect this Blog of mine...

Just another day...

2004-06-24T23:39:00.000+08:00

Geez... failed to update since tuesday... just thought it's time to submit another piece on my boring life...

Anyway, the day started early, literally, got outta bed at around 7.30am, and managed to reach school's Concourse building just in time at 9am.

Qn : Reason why I'm there so early during the holidays?
Ans: Freshmen Orientation Rehearsal...

It's basically a walkthrough on how to get the Freshmens together in small groups for a ice-breaking session and leading them through workshops, and on the Campus tour.

We Class Reps went through the workshop programmes ourselves, with the lecturer watching us throughout. To be honest, it was a bore. Most of us have been through all these activities, and asking us to go through it again is like -DUH-... Everything was the same, just that this time we are the facilitators instead of being those who were being facilitated...

The things that's on my mind since today's rehearsal are Mr Chee's words... he said the 2 facilitators in charge of a class, should consist of one joker and one serious person, so that the joker could bring life into the class's ice-breaking session... On the other hand, the serious one can be there to stop the joker just in case the joking went too far...

I guess anyone who knew me would point to the fact that I'm not a eloquent speaker and neither am I a seasoned joker... and being SERIOUS? Naw. What a joke.

Neither of both, I just wonder how would I do as a facilitator. -Worried- Hope I won't do too badly next Monday to Wednesday. :)

Putting that aside, the rest of the day... you probably might have guessed it, was spent on Championship Manager 2003/04. As I am writing this at around 12am, I think I'm gonna catch the Euro 2004 quarter final match between England and Portugal...

England gotta win it.

steamboat...

2004-06-22T13:13:00.000+08:00

Had my steamboat dinner last night with old friends... All of them still as fun and as crappy as they were during secondary school...

Desmond, in particular, looks to be having a lot of fun in Ngee Ann Poly (kinda regretted not going there, heh), cheeks grown pink due to constant fun in the Sun, and I had a chat with him about school life and found out that his life in poly is much more better than mine... (sigh~)

Anyway... back to the dinner, I reached Marina at about 6+ (some 15 minutes after the meeting time) with Bert, Wee and Lee Yi. True to customary 07 slackers custom, there were quite a few others who came later than my group, but everyone had no qualms about waiting for them at the hot and stuffy Marina Bay station. Finally everyone arrived and we set off towards the bus stop, and even before we reach it, we were coerced into a minivan and set off for the steamboat 'restaurant'... (Bad choice if you asked me, was expecting something nicer like the Ma La steamboat.)

Wasn't the most hygenic of places, even had a dead fly (gulp!) on the table that needed to be wiped off... but they did had some nice food on selection. So we just happily chatted and dined (couldnt go much into this, hard to describe :P) all the way through the night till around 10, before we set off for the Gaming Arcade nearby.

We walked into the Arcade in a big group, by that time there wasn't much people in there so we literally had the whole place to ourselves. Played a race of Daytona with 4 other friends, after which, watched a friend play Virtual Cop 3 all the way towards the end with just 1 credit (amazing how he got so far, if you ask me)... Finally the whole group gathered by the drum machines, and watch two guys, Ben Chen and Kang Tai, beat the drums away. Birthday boy Ben certainly hit the drums well in sync, chalking up 300 combi hits at one time, Im so utterly amazed... dun think i can ever do that.. hahz.

After which, we all left the Arcade, and managed to catch the last train back to Kranji. It was a typically late night outing for all the guys, and we kinda treated one of the carriage as ours, both row of seats occupied by us only, talking and laughing loudly, as if the whole train was ours. Perfect way to end a outing.

We alighted at Woodlands and headed seperate ways home by cab. I wanted to watch Euro 2004 when I reached home since its already 2am... but the longer i sit idle on the sofa, the more I want to sleep...so in the end... its zzZzzzZzzzz.....

boring holidays...

2004-06-20T10:37:00.000+08:00

"*yAwnz*... just woke up... sheesh its 10:30am already..."

It's been like that for me ever since this term of school holiday started. Its been play, play, play... and MORE play. Every single day will start at 10am and ends at 2am for me. Getting sick and tired of this life, can't wait for school to resume classes.

Let's see what have i done during the holidays...

1. I tried to brush up my Engineering Maths... FAILED.

Didn't really get started, got some notes from cousins, but never fully utilise it, really need to buck up soon.

Hmmz, that's about the only -serious- thing I set out to do for the holidays, and I didn't even complete it. Wasted. This entry looks so boring to me so far, lol~.

Other more interesting things...

There was the chalet back in May with my classmates, that was fun, bunch of people who could stay up all night playing poker cards and PS2, and plonked into bed the moment the Sun arises.

Then, there was the weekly soccer sessions at Cashew Heights. The experience of playing there is like being in the EPL, the action's fast & furious, up and down... up and down, -period- just that the playing area is just a small basketball court... haha :D. Even so, there are quite a few people who are more than capable of playing beautiful soccer, such as Bobby, Zhi Peng, Wee Leong... I'm just happy that they are willing to play with lousy me...

Recently, I been going to pool session with my cousin and snooker session with friends...
Anyone who played pool should know the satisfaction of finally potting the ball into the pockets... Kinda sick of 8-ball and 9-ball, getting attracted to snooker, the satisfaction of hitting the smaller balls into the pockets is just much more than both 8 and 9-ball...

Then finally, theres Euro 2004 on TV...awkward timing though. 12am and 2.45am. @_@ Always able to watch the 12am match, but cant last through the 2.45 one. For once, I do not have any favoured teams in the competition, but teams like czech republic has caught my eye after yesterday's performance against Holland... fantastic match... they came back from 2-1 down to win 2-3... brilliant.

I like Latvia too, their players are not the creme de la creme of the world, but they play it with such determination, that the more skilled players have problems playing against them. Hats off to them for their gritty 0-0 draw with the Germans. :D

That's about it...

Ahh, and there's the steamboat session at Marina tomorrow with old friends. Hope that would turn out fun.

Alright, I shall leave you with this one heck of a boring entry... Apologies...

anger management (The idea was there, but shame about the execution)

2004-06-18T15:18:00.000+08:00

"Ahh.. I feel like smashing things to pieces again..."

Sheesh, its the umpteenth time today that i felt like doing that... The thought of my bad back infuriates me... When can it recover? It's been like hurting for months and months and almost a year now. I feel sick and tired having to nurse it without much effect. It limits my mobility severely.

Here i am again, spending the day away wastefully playing the -love of my live-, Championship Manager 2003/04, on my PC. Needless to say, i find myself angry again. Playing with a good friend of mine over the net, our teams met in the game, and i got thrashed 6-2. Its such a trivial thing, looking back at it, but it was another instance when i got worked up for nothing.

Over the course of my life, i bet i have built up a reputation of flaring up for the slightest of reasons... Hate that tag, BIG TIME. I thought i have calmed down over the years, but looking back, i dont think i did.

There was this incident sometime back, while i was playing soccer with my mates, 1 of them fired a shot which ended up against my bad lower back, i just turned around and let vulgarities out all over the place... To his credit, he didnt even bother to argue back, and ignored me asif im crazy, sheesh... i AM nuts. Sorry to the guy, you know who you are. :D

More recently, there has been some pranksters plucking away the leaves and destroying my mum's plants that's left on the corridor. My family got a faint idea of whose the culprit, but couldn't get any proof on it... and that day, i almost took matters into my own hand... I stared at the "Culprit's" plants and was already itching to go over and do some -gardening-... so much so that until my parents lectured me out of it.

There are many more such instances which i shall refrain from revealing, dun wish to shame myself any further.

I really hope i could change for the better... :

1. Shall remain calm in all incidents that's "designed to incur anger"
2. Shall remain calm
and finally,
3. Remain calm

(Sounds real crappy but i felt that's the only way to keep my anger in check.)

I got a favour to ask from those who know me, do tell me, if I -ever- did change for the better regarding my horrible temperament.

lonely.

2004-06-17T18:32:00.000+08:00

2nd Blog...

It's been in my mind for quite some time, -yiKez- my social circle is getting smaller! Looking at the address book list in my phone nowadays, there's only a handful of people i would -dare- to ask to go out... Am I that anti-social? I really hope I'm not but it's hard to believe in that when you are in my shoes...

Sometimes i wondered, had i went to JC, would my social circle be as pathetic as now? Don't get me wrong, Poly is not exactly bad by any means... just that being in JC, there's more chance of mingling with people (e.g. those people in the next classroom), being in Poly is like, you will only know people from your buddy class, and not anymore other than that, unless you're very -OuTsTaNdInG- (in whatever sense you can think of)...

Where are all my old friends? I hope I would be able to catch up with them sometime... and not be feeling so isolated as i feel now.

my 1st Blog. how exciting.

2004-06-17T11:22:00.000+08:00

Blogs.

I never knew what it meant.

But here I am.

Hello everybody! My screen-name's Gabbeh!

A proud Singaporean. (yea rite.)

So, do come back and check if i have posted any more shit like this 1.

Cya!