GABBEH!!™

Yeay! It's me again. Finally POLY is over!!! *whistles* WEEEeeeeweeEET*! Just had my last paper yesterday. Boy, this sem my grades are probably gonna be D,C,C,C. Never got a C before in the first 2 1/2 years and now... everything becomes a C! x.x My previous post... I currently dun have the mood to follow up on it so probably gotta wait alittle while more before I get warmed up to the idea again. Hmm, it was dated Jan 18 *shocked* oops... I neglected this blog of mine again. Let me see what I can update here. February... First ever Valentines' Day passed with me being attached. Wahaha! What a crappy achievement. Pardon me Darling *hee*. She gave me a RW disc, and I didn't really get her a prezzie. =x I had my first NAPFA test in 3 years. Needless to say, my meagre preparation was nowhere enough for the test itself. Wahaha. Held on a rainy day, first station go for Chin Ups already. I just looked at the tester... "Alright, just put a big fat 0 there" -LOL- Startin...

Ever had times when you just felt like saying to someone or something up there that goes like "Bring me back in time, back to the very day when I was born... and give me the chance to re-live my life again!" Nothing to do, just felt like listing down the significant milestone of my lengthy yet next-to-nothing life. Alright, here goes, without much consideration of how accurate the data is going to be: 1986 I was born in K.K Hosp. Year of the Tiger. Lesser babies than usual this particular year cos everyone believes that children born in the year of the Tiger would be much more volatile commpared to babies born in other years. Hmm. Makes you wonder, shouldn't dragon be worse than tiger? And yet ppl rush to bear a child in Dragon's years... Couldn't remember much about this particular year. Too young. Weighed 3.3kg. Pretty heavy (and the trend will go on. lmao) 1987 Again, nothing in memory about this particular year. Probably a baby just lazing around all the time...

First day of 2006! I should have alot to say. Haha. A little update on what's upcoming in my life now these days. Alright, let's start with school! Ok, I'm already well into my 2 weeks (1 E-learning, 1 study break) of holidays, in fact, the exams are gonna start in 2 more days! *gasp* Haha. I feel so unprepared. This should not be the case! But too bad la, I seemed to get infected with the Civilization 4 craze along with my classmate. Been playing the game till 3, 4 am in the wee hours of the morning for the past few days. After the exam week, I gotta head back to base to declare some indebtedness form to the guys in the Sea. Following which I will put all my energy into finishing up my FYP. I should have another week of break coming up when the SPINNOVEX comes along in January. Following which, there will be Chinese New Year AND GGG's Bday (Happy Birthday in advance, Darling! ^_^) Febuary would bring me to the moment which I feared the most since I entered Poly... the ...

Went jogging today... Halfway, cannot make it alrdy. Start, stop, start, stop. Damn unfit sia. Then halfway reached Rail-Mall.. then went in the Cold Storage and came out with 1 bottle of mango flavored Snapple and 1 packet of Ruffles. Then sat down with Lin by the drain and watch the traffic and the sky while munching the Ruffles and finishing up the drink, somewhat like some fricking beggars by the side of the road. Damn slack la, Chin ups are still hopeless for me.. moving on to other stuffs.... "right... right... right... WRONG!" Ever had that happening? Haha. You do something, or say something... that appears so correct, so well planned.. then all of a sudden on the last stretch, something/someone shouted out, WRONG!!! *Screeeeechhhhes* I'm too sensitive... ahh. Help. Help in-sensitize me... I'm too immature... help me mature! Haha. I think I'm going nuts. I tried too hard sometimes... but please put up with me. =] I wish I could be perfect... but nah, I cou...

Missed yet another lecture. Ahhh, what's happening to me? 9+ to 5+ in the project lab. Woo-la-la... I'm trying to wrap up the programming of the FYP in 1 single day! (Is that right? Haha.) Feeling rather braindead now... though I still harbour hopes of finishing up the programming today, but it seems abit too far for me right now. Nevertheless, I shall try! Never give up, Never surrender! Haha. Saw MX on my way home... she looked kinda different with long hair... Haha. Managed to catch a glance and picked up my courage and waved a Hello at her. Finally, not avoiding anymore, well done, Gab! Haha. I'm such a loser... alright la, thats all folks! "I put my trust in you, no matter what..."

Hello people... I dunno how to put this across as I dunwant too many people to know what happened. So I will just say I'm extremely happy with things in my life nowadays. I'm going about everyday thinking that I'm living a dream... Haha... but I was just told by someone that it wasn't a dream! So... haha, to that someone, thank you! "Discovery of the day: I speak incoherently when I'm extremely happy."

"Life is full of surprises." Whoever was the first to mutter this out under his/her breath is a bloody genius! Haha. I'm typing this devoid of feelings at the moments. Not devoid of colours though! Haha. I am daft, and you guys knew it. (And no one bothered to tell me! Good people you sure are... Haha) Some things in life, when forced through, could have good results and bad results. Some results would leave you dunno whether to laugh or cry. Perhaps I'm just sandwiched in between. I'm speaking so vaguely that I wondered if anyone of you actually knew what I am talking about. Then again, I dun feel anything, so who cares? Haha. Alright. Enough, all of you get back to the life you came from (which should and ought to be much more interesting than mine) and stop wasting your time here reading this crap. Begone! "Want you to love me... Want you to be... the Heavens above me... Eternally..." --- Background vocals from Robbie's Tripping

Definition of lovesick from www.dictionary.com : adj. 1. So deeply affected by love as to be unable to act normally. 2. Exhibiting a lover's yearning. 3. Languishing because of love; "strong men behaving like lovesick boys" Definition of melancholy from www.dictionary.com : noun. 1. Sadness or depression of the spirits; gloom: “There is melancholy in the wind and sorrow in the grass” (Charles Kuralt). 2. Pensive reflection or contemplation. 3. (Archaic.) Black bile. 4. (Archaic.) An emotional state characterized by sullenness and outbreaks of violent anger, believed to arise from black bile. adj. 1. Affected with or marked by depression of the spirits 2. Tending to promote sadness or gloom: a letter with some melancholy news. 3. Pensive; thoughtful. I must have excess black bile secreted inside me! HA! woh woh woh... "If loving you was a crime, then I will be spending the rest of my life in jail"

It was actually just an alright day. But it just went awry when I came home sat by my computer like I do everyday, and my mum just peered in to view what I was playing. I just couldn't stand her curious stare and I just exploded. A tiff ensued and once again I was in the wrong. I will always be in the wrong when it involves mum. As I spent a few hours in my room in isolation... my Mum just continued screaming at me.. saying I nvr been this, I nvr been that and that 3 yrs of poly studies has changed me alot. Change I did I guess. So does everyone. But I think I really grown to be apart far apart from everyone. Apart from friends. Apart from my classmates. Apart from my parents. I dun want it to be this way, but I dunno how to change. I dun like people to be so deliberate in finding out what I am doing, but at the same time, I dun want to project an impression to others that I am stuck-up and withdrawn from the world. I dunno la. I feel like such a outcast. Bye. "The Prophecy i...

I'm putting my hands clasped together in the hope that I will be guided through slowly and softly. I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Let's just hope it's not a false dawn. I know where I stand. I will bow out gracefully. "... it doesn't even matter."

BANG! Sunday Afternoon! And I'm at home typing this post! Just came back from lunch. Alone. Another typical moody day. Where's the spark in my life? I'm so far apart from those who are close to me that I don't even know where I belonged anymore. I just dawned upon another fantasy of mine, and that is... to stay at home 24/7! Haha. I dunwant to see anyone. I dunwant to go out. I dunwant to be bothered with school, projects and other stuffs. I just wanna be home, safe from the rain, problems, Sun, and just about everything else. I just dunno what else I could do to feel better. I'm refusing to leave the house since soccer outing yesterday. Friends asked me to go pool today, I turn down. Dad asked me to go for breakfast in the morning.. at first I said yes.. later I said "No, I need a rest". I just wanna be left alone, yet I want to be with somebody. I'm afraid I will go all bonkers. I feel like the homeless. Unwanted. Unloved. Despised. Maybe I just want...

Normal Days... Brain: I want you to do this! Leg: Affirmative. Brain: I want you to do that! Hands: Roger that! So one fine day, Brain needs to work with Heart to work out a decision. Brain: I think our master need to just give things up. Heart: No! I think our master should try to hang on to things. And with that, comes hope that things would take a turn for the better. Brain: According to me, it's more logical to give things up so to move on to better and finer things. Heart: I refuse! Brain: You must accept my commands! Heart: No! Brain: Yes! Heart: No! No! No! I'm more emotional, therefore what I control the master to do in the spur of the moment is usually right! Brain: Nah. I'm more logical and rational, I control the master to execute things planned well in advance and usually with the correct results. Emotions are useless in solving problems. Heart: Sometimes I work faster than you, I give the master emotions, I give the master strength to carry out things that you ...

I made it to school on time today. Didn't rush at all even though I left house at 7.30 sharp. Took a different route though. Took the bus behind my block and stopped outside Central and took the train to school. Maybe I should do that everyday. Its a chore walking all the way to the bus stop that has 106, only to squeeze on the bus and stand all the way. Perhaps I'm just plain lazy. School went relatively smoothly today, though during the break, I, Naelin and Jit & Co went Queensway to help Guru shop for a pair of street soccer boots. After school, the whole big gang of us just bundled ourselves into Raj house to watch a Hindu movie! Haha. Chips, Soft Drinks and Vodka were all around. I took a sip of Vodka + Sprite combined and immediately felt the heat building up inside. Stopped almost instantly. Was feeling so worried about my whole face going red, as someone else has already done so. Came home at around 7+. Sat in front of the comp until now. Played FM and got the EURO ...

I won my first major silverware in FM 2006! Haha. Arsenal --> EURO Cup champs 2005/2006 XD

Just downloaded the chinese song.. Old song. It's actually a remix by Andy Lau and Jacky Wu, got some dialogue in the middle of the song which is quite funny. Listening to them, makes me wonder, when I grow up to become a middle aged guy, would I have a group of male friends to laugh, cry, sing, chat with me? Haha. Thinking too much already. Half the world is into Hari Raya le, at this point of time. I will like to take this opportunity again to wish all muslims in the world Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri! =] Anyway, I shall move on with some thoughts of my own. Recent events have made me pretty tired, disillusioned. FYP, work, stuffs that really drained me... I finally figured out that perhaps I shld just leave everything to destiny or fate. I no longer feel that I have the will to change things or shape my own path to my future. I dun think I have the determination nor the ability to really gave a big shakeup to how my life's gonna be. Perhaps for some people, "When there...

Refreshing to stroll through the park. Very scenic, really can help to ease a troubled mind. Haha. I'm just crapping.

Yoyoyoyo!~ I. Skip. Sch. Again. YAY!!! Haha. I really dunno why I am so slack regarding 8am school days. Oh well, here I am. Haha. Went Viv's house yesterday, and boy, the food and snacks were great! Thanks Viv! Haha. Thanks for the great tasting snacks! Don't you feel that you're drooling even though it is just a picture? Haha. Anyway, as I reached Viv's house, I caught sight of the little garden (or yard as some of you might called it) just infront of the house. It was really a little patch but just have that cosy feeling, that you just feel like lie down there on the grass in the middle of it and suntan ur lazy day away. This picture don't really do justice to how cosy the actual thing actually feels. Just picture yourself, on a sunny hot afternoon, you take a beach chair or a rubber pool out into that little patch of grass there and just lay there throughout the afternoon. That is heaven man. Wahaha. Dream on, Gab! Or if you are into astronomy and such, you coul...

Howdy ppl! I'm gradually loosening my grip on the nozzle. (Of what, I dunno.) I can feel it. Hope that this isn't a knee-jerk reaction. Perhaps it is, perhaps it's not, oh why bother? Haha. I'm tired... *yawns* Ho's gonna ask us if we are ready for FYP next week. Oh whatevers-up-there, please gimme a sign. Haha. Deepavali and Hari Raya coming up next week, so to all my indian and muslim friends, Happy Deepavali and Selamat Hari Raya!~ To the muslims especially, "I'm looking forward to eating with you in the day again! Haha." Just changed my Video browser to a very cool and sleek black skin, just fit in snugly with my blog template as well. Cheers!~ Cya people. "Who has to know? Those stuffs I can't deny. I admit . I confess ."

Leftovers from drafts I tried to combine during the week: October's almost gone in a glance... So much time gone, so little done. Or is it just me? Ha. Very soon the new semester will be upon us and the rollercoaster ride of education would start for me again. Got back my results. Avoided Cs but no As for me this time, just one distinction to be happy about. Anyway, I'm having 2nd thoughts of not going to Uni. Suddenly felt that, because of my very puny amount of knowledge regarding going Uni via you-know-what, is causing me to feel this way. Ahh. What's the fuss. Things will most probably straighten itself out soon enough. *Shakes head violently and stomps feet to some techno/trance/hard metal rhythm* Here's the ranting from today... New Blog skin... "How? How? How!? Nice!?" *mimics some chirpy teenage girl's voice. Finally, about a year into the opening of this blog, I finally gave it a makeover. Or shld I say, I finally copied some html codes and modifi...

Another walk on the tightrope. Another punch on the face. Another cut on that flawless skin. How long could this possibly last? It was selfish. It was appalling. But it was raw. Feeling more and more upset as hours ticked by God knows if you felt the same way too Maybe I shouldn't have asked. Maybe you shouldn't have told me. I'm too afraid of what lies ahead. But I don't want you gone. Shame is all that I could felt. Sorry is all that I could muster. Signed, Deepest realm inside of me.